FROM THE SAME DIRT ▹ seresin ✓

x. i wish you were a better man

"Uncle Pete—,"

He tugged her into another embrace, mouth by her ear, "Take a breather, kid."

She pressed a kiss to Finch's cheek and let them drift so she could turn to Jake, hands clasped, eyes wide in uncertainty. He stepped instantly closer, their boots nearly touching, his expression complicated. Eyes darting all over her face, he seemed to be chewing on his words. Kade dreaded whatever he would come up with.

Finally, "I... don't know what to say, Kade."

He didn't apologize. He didn't tell her he understood her pain. It was perfect.

Kade threw her arms around his neck and hugged herself to his body. If he was shocked by the sudden affection, he didn't mention it. Jake just latched those strong arms around her back and cradled her close. Hiding her face into his collar bone, she let a few tears slip loose. It was safe with him. He wouldn't judge her. He just murmured sweet things to her, lips brushing her temple, hand gently stroking over her hair.

Eventually, she drew away to wipe her eyes with the back of her hands, "Thanks..."

"Anytime, kid." He lifted her chin so their eyes would meet, "You wanna take a drive?"

Hours and hours later, Kade and Jake sat side—by—side on the dark beach outside The Hard Deck, staring out at the endless black water. The sun had long since set, and there was no moon tonight. Even the stars were hiding behind a dark blanket of clouds. Silence had settled upon them, and Jake refused to break it until Kade spoke.

"On the beach."

Those were the first words she had said in five hours.

Lounging on his elbows in the sand, Jake looked over with his expression open and waiting.

The woman smiled to herself, voice soft and a thousand miles away, "It's what they say when Navy men retire: he's 'On The Beach'. I always liked that. When I was really little, I had this picture in my head... of my dad, Maverick, Goose, and all their friends wandering around here, looking out into the past."

Kade drifted back into silence with a sharp shake of her head, blinking hard to keep back tears.

"Are you okay?"

It was a stupid question; Jake immediately wanted to take it back as soon as he asked it, but he couldn't. Besides, what else did he have to say? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

"Yes..." She decided slowly, resolutely, jaw clenched tight.

Jake sighed and shook his head at her, "You don't have to do that, you know, not with me. Don't go cold on me, Frosty. Let me in. Talk to me, darlin', huh?"

Her eyes were full of tears, glimmering in bar lights, bottom lip trembling, "It hurts too much. Too d—mn much. I don't think I can do this without him. I don't... I want..."

Gently, Jake tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, "What do you want?"

"I want it back."

"What?"

"Yesterday."

Tsking, Jake turned and pointed out past the dark horizon, "Well, you look way out there — out past the date line. West becomes east, all things change. You cross the line... today becomes yesterday... or tomorrow, I forget which."

"That's what I want."

He accepted this with a thoughtful nod of his head, glancing over with a small purse to his lips. "Of course the line's just imaginary, kid." He shrugged a shoulder, "You can cross it twenty times... nothing really changes. You've got to face it head on. Whatever's out there waiting for you, you can't run from it. You can't freeze it out. Not anymore. That's what he would have wanted."