My Name Is Schedule

Sobs

Before I could register anything in my brain, Kyran had flung himself out of bed and hurtled himself toward the door. I stumbled after him, dazed and disoriented, everything fuzzy.

Outside screams and bangs of guns were heard everywhere.

Kyran stopped, dead still in the doorway. He was unnaturally immobile, and his chest was heaving with heavy breaths.

Outside citizens were screaming, running for their lives if they knew anything. Plenty didn't, and stood there like pigs in a slaughterhouse. Officials swarmed the streets, firing at random. Everyone's hair was different, catching the sun and gleaming. To my delight, there were blondes, brunettes, real redheads with hair that was practically glowing, and everything inbetween.

But I couldn't feel any delight whatsoever. This was a massacre.

Something struck me as off, something was wrong. Besides the street killing, that is. I forced myself to turn around and look at the clock.

12:34.

Kyran and I had slept in for over half an hour. I couldn't breathe. We hadn't even been caught in this chaos.

I watched multiple people being shot, and felt like I was, myself. A sob caught in my throat as I saw everything unravel.

Kyran took off like the wind. He scrambled through the streets like he was on fire, screaming for Schedule 720.

With a jolt, I realized that must be Zara. His face was only horror and fear as he tore through he streets, shoving people over. I clutched my dress and frantically stumbled over the cobblestone, trying to keep up, tears welling in my eyes.

Then, a bit late, I thought of my own family. Were they dead?

They could be bleeding to death currently, across town, or just a house away. I began to break down in sobs, trying to shut out everything. It weighed down on me hard, because at that second I realized this was all my fault.

Kyran ran through his former house, calling out for Zara by her Schedule number, with no response. His eyes were shining with tears.

"Where is she?" He asked himself, his voice a hoarse whisper. Then he realized for the first time that I was there. "CELESTE!"

He used my name. It would've been a dead giveaway at any other point in Schedule history, but at this point there was yelling everywhere, and this would go unnoticed.

"GET BACK IN THE HOUSE!"

I shook my head, unable to form a single syllable with my mouth.

Kyran ran over to me, and helped me up from the collapsed form I had become. We just stared at each other, silent. I wanted to scream, I wanted to move, I wanted to stop everything. But I couldn't.

I suddenly yanked myself away from him, and tried to remember how to find my house. I tripped over a body and screamed in horror. The glassy, glazed over eyes of the man seemed to stare into my soul.

"He's dead," I said quietly aloud.

I had to keep moving. I pulled myself forward, trying to erase that awful image that was stamped into my memory.

I stumbled into a couple, much older than me, sobbing. Sobbing familiar sobs.

I looked at them through my cloudy vision, and realized they were my parents. Their sobs were uncontrollable. I barely took notice of their hair, which was now glistening different colors. The only thing that came to mind as I stared at them was one thought.

Why were they sobbing?

I told myself it was just everything, the traumatizing screams of everyone and the bloodshed. But it was a heartfelt cry. A cry that only happened when a hole had been ripped through your heart. When you lost someone close to your heart.

My heart wouldn't slow down as I tried to block out the enormous sob that threatened to consume me. I could not bring myself to say it. Denial would not change it, but I could not bear to face the truth. 

"Where," I choked, "is 850?"

My brother.

Where was my brother?

They didn't say a word, but vaguely pointed behind them at a limp body on the ground.

I fell to the ground, and I screamed. Tears flowed down my cheeks and seemed like burning acid as they raked my cheeks.

There was a bullet embedded in my brother's chest, right next to his heart. His eyes were closed, but I could hear him shakily breathing.

He was still alive.

I hoped for the best. It would be fine. He would survive a few more minutes until we could find help. But I knew that was false hope. The bullet was too close to his heart, and he was practically dead already.

"852."

His voice was barely a whisper, dwindling away with his life force.

"You'll be fine," I sobbed. "Hang on, okay?"

I could barely hear him, but his tone was something I'd never heard before. Rage.

"This-" he gritted his teeth. He coughed violently. "This is what happens--when--" he coughed again. "When the Schedule-" he looked me straight in the eyes. "Isn't-followed."

His awful expression of pain ceased. His shaky breathing stopped.

I stared stupidly, waiting for him to speak. Then it hit me. The horrible truth.

He was gone.

"NO!" I screamed.

"NO!" My screams drowned out everything else. "That's not-"

My voice caught in my throat. He had died thinking Schedule was still to be followed.

That was the last thing I wanted, the last thing Kyran and I were trying to do. This wasn't inspiring people to rebel. This was scaring people to obey Schedule, to NEVER rebel.

Tears stung my eyes. "Please-"

I had never really thought about how much my brother meant to me. I mean, I just took his life for granted. He had always been there, always been a playmate and a friend to me. He was the same as my parents when it came to Schedule, but he was no doubt one of the closest people to me.

And I never had the chance to tell that to him. I never would.

We had sacrificed the lives of at least over a hundred people for nothing. This would, if anything, stop any hopes of rebelling.

I felt a hand on my shaking shoulder. "We need to go."

The voice was gentle and calm, but full of sadness and worry. I turned, and through my tears, I saw Zara.

All my sadness turned to rage as I saw her.

She was still alive. She was surviving the massacre, while my brother lay dead on the streets.

It wasn't fair. She shouldn't be here, she should be dead.

I tackled her, my vision clouded with fury. She fell down on the bricks hard as I tried to strangle her.

Zara's face was white with fear. "CELESTE." She was choking by my hand.

Hearing my name snapped me out of my trance. I yanked my hands away from her, horrified. I had almost killed her. I had almost killed my own friend.

What was wrong with me?

I began to sob harder, and collapsed on the road.

Zara used all the strength she had to drag me into a house, away from my brother. We sat under a table, too traumatized to even cry.

"I'm sorry," I gasped. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," she replied. 

I couldn't believe I had tried to kill her.

"Is Kyran-"

"I don't know," Zara said quickly, covering up her fear as best as she could. Her chocolate eyes were teary and she bit down hard on her lip.

"I don't know," she repeated, and tears began to fall like rain down her face.