𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐖𝐚𝐲 𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐄𝐲𝐞𝐬 𝐀𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐌𝐞

𝟐𝟓.

Tuesday, 24th December 1985

Dearest Man Journal,

I'm not sure how much longer I can take it.

Dad is drunk downstairs and even though I shouldn't be, I'm scared. I'm so fucking scared that I physically can't move from my place. Making the slightest noise angers him, as you know, and I'm just not ready for another beating. He hurt me last night again. Bad.

I know this seems a little off topic, but I'm sure you're wondering why I named you 'Man Journal', rather than 'Diary' or something basic. Well, I guess the word 'Diary' is something that the girls in those high-school drama movies would name you, and I'm not a girl. Meaning I shouldn't be acting as if I'm a girl either.

My dad told me than I shouldn't be weak, otherwise I'll never become 'ready for the real world', and to be honest, I'm not sure what he implied by that either.

Anyway, I guess the biggest point I'm trying to make is that I want to man up, because being pussy is what I fear the most. That's also a reason why I've been avoiding Mike, if you exclude the fact that he hates my guts. Mike just makes me vulnerable and I don't like that. But my dad does, because it gives him an excuse to 'hurt me into strength', I also don't know why he thinks it's a good solution.

Well, I guess that's all I have to say.

Actually- I'd also like to say goodbye. Just incase I don't end up writing to you again because at this point, it's likely - even though it goes against the whole 'don't be a pussy' thing.

Goodbye.

—"

I exhale sharply when I finish reading the entry, shocked by what I just viewed. I pick up my walkie and connect to Powell's channel.

"Hey Powell, do you copy? Over."

"Yeah, I copy. What's up? Over."

"Bring Mr Walsh here for more questioning." I instruct firmly.

"What, why? Over."

"Drug usage and child abuse, I don't know- maybe more that we're yet to find out about. Over."

"Copy that, chief. We'll be with you soon. Over and out." He says before I push down the antenna and turn my attention back to the journal. I pick it up and look through the different pages in search for more information on the relationship between him and Mike- if we're talking about the same person, anyway. His way of writing entries makes it unclear who he's talking about, so maybe it's best to just ask him myself.

I can't believe someone so young left the world just like that. After Sarah, I decided not to hold things against the people I love, because I'll never know when they leave me. And this is just another reminder.

I sigh and lean my elbow against the desk, pinching the bridge of my nose in attempt not to shed a tear.

Fri. 27th December 1985 | 15:51pm
Mike Wheeler

Today is the day that I can finally see Will again. Sure, the last time we physically spoke was only like two days ago, but it hits different when you fear someone not wanting to speak to you ever again, but then things go right. Well- I'm hoping they go right.