East or West

Please don't turn around

"I told you that I don't want her. I heard about what she did to you so trust me when I say I won't fall for a girl like that. I love and want you. Only you." he kisses my forehead.

"Okay." I hug him.

The hug feels a little weird because I'm naked and wet but it's comforting so I don't mind.

____

We step out of the shower and he wraps my towel for me. "Thank you." I smile.

"Mhm." he wraps his.

We walk out into his room but I have to go to mine because I don't have clothes in here.

"Move in with me." he says as I open the door.

"I already live with you..." I say.

"No, princess," he smiles, "bring your clothes in here. I have an empty closet and dresser that has your name on it."

"Nah, that's too much and I'm lazy." I start walking again.

"I'll do it; I just want you in here with me for good."

"I'll think about it."

____

Geo's about to leave now. He looks nice too. I'm jealous that that she's gonna get to see him like this.

"I'll be back before eight tonight, okay? And if I'm not, call me." he says while rubbing my shoulders.

"But what if she sees my name in your phone? Then what?"

"Your name in my phone is Princess now. If she asks, I'll say it's my sister, alright? I love you, baby. I'll be back soon." he kisses my forehead and heads for the door.

"I love you too and be careful."

"I will." he leaves and closes the door behind him.

Now I can Google everything.

I walk upstairs into Geo's bedroom and grab his laptop. He left it password-less so I could use it.

I type into Google, 'how to get rid of sexual assault nightmares' and I see hotlines. The main thing that catches my eye is a website. It has the following steps:

•Reassure yourself that you're safe and the event is NOT happening right now
•Breathe slowly and clearly as you become aware of your safe surroundings

And the most difficult one:

•Talk to a family member or significant other

These all seem like they won't work. I don't wanna talk about it to anyone. It's so embarrassing.

"Shit," I murmur.

LIVE! I have to go live.

I look a little crazy right now. My hair is in a high bun but I didn't necessarily brush it and I'm in a thick grey champion sweatshirt with sweatpants. Yes, I have an unhealthy obsession with sweats and I'm not ashamed to admit it.

I start the live on my PC, "hey, buddies. What game are we playing today?" I question while surfing through the comments.

comments:
"play through season 1 of TWD!"
"oooo yeah^^"
"yuuuuus. I wanna see Lee."

"Oh, I've played TWD already... not on live though so I'll play through it again. How about this; I play an episode every other day until we finish the season. Is that okay with you guys?"

They all reply yes.

I click replay on the game and start the first episode.

I got to the part when the car flips on the road and the driver turns to a zombie when the comments went wild,

comments:
"who is that behind you?"
"Kia... turn around"
"no no no! don't turn around"

"What the hell are y'all talking about?" I ask in a whisper. I'm scared to turn around.

comments:
"there's a guy in all black standing behind you."
"Kia please be careful"

I'm scared. Please no. I start hyperventilating really bad. My chest is tight and my hands are shaking. I don't wanna turn around.

I can't breathe.

comments:
"LMFAO WE WERE KIDDING"
"anyone else mad concerned as to why she seemed so calm?"
"yeah, i am. OMG IS YOUR DAD A MAFIA LEADER?"

"That was fucked up." I say out of anger.

comments:
"y'all she just cussed.."
"what the hell did we do?"
"omg."
"We Messed Up So Bad"

"I'm taking a break from streaming for a while. Bye." I end the live.

I know it's not their fault but I really can't. My hands are still shaking and I'm still nearly breathless. I'll call Kai.

I pick up my phone and dial his number in the key pad while consistently shaking my other hand.

"Hello?"

"Ka-"

"Nah, I'm just playing this my voicemail. I'll call you back though!" and then there's a beep.

I don't know if Daddy has his phone back or not so I'll call Sully.

The phone rings for a while and I almost lost hope but he picks up, "hey, Key. What's up?"

"S-sully. I'm having a panic attack and I need you to talk... to me." I stutter.

"Okay, Key. Uh, how's everything going with you and Geo? Did you tell him how you felt? Are you two official?" he questions.

"Y-yeah... we made it official last night." I reply.

"Okay, good. Has he been treating you good?"

"Mhm." I catch my breath.

"Have you streamed yet?"

Damn.

"Yeah, that's why I'm like this. They pranked me and said someone was behind me and you know... with the work our family is in... I believed them."

"Oh, yeah. I get it, mama. Do you want me to come over?" he asks.

He really shouldn't.

"Yeah."

"I'll be there in ten, okay? Get a blanket, ice cream and pull up The Princess and The Frog on the tv." he says.

"Okay."

I did as he said and he literally got here in ten.

"You ready?" he questions while waiting to start the movie.

"Yeah." I'm lying down on the long part of the couch and he's sitting on the shorter side. I'm wrapped in a blanket burrito and his is just over his head.

I'm glad he pulled through for me.