Open Wounds - A Bucky Barnes Soulmate AU

Chapter Thirteen

Time passed.

You and your soulmate spent more time together. Went on more dates. And you were happy. You really were. Even if part of you still didn't trust him completely. Even if part of you was waiting for the day you looked in his eyes and found nothing but the soldier staring back at you.

So you held back. Just a bit. Just enough to guard your heart and keep your head about you. Enough to feel safe and in control.

After a lot of procrastination, you had been making progress repacking the jumbled boxes that held your life with the help of the Avengers. Mainly Bucky, Steve, Nat and Clint. You were wrapping breakables and sorting contents into new boxes labeled by room. Some things you left out, others you tossed or donated. You had no idea you and your dad had so much worthless shit in your apartment. Currently, you were sorting through kitchen utensils while Nat and Clint worked on their own boxes.

The three of you were laughing at some story Clint was telling about his kids when his voice trailed off. "Oh. Oh no."

You turned to him with wide eyes as you searched for the problem. He looked between the box he'd been sorting and you. He shook his head and stepped back to make room for you.

Your stomach churned as you glanced inside, afraid of whatever he'd found. It took you a moment to realize that that the assorted pieces of plastic and glass had once been your small snow globe collection. A blanket on the bottom of the box seemed to have soaked up all the liquid.

Oh.

For the most part they were cheap plastic with only a couple of nicer ones thrown in. But they had been a tradition with you and Phil. It had started with him bringing back the most bizarre, cheesy snow globe he could find when he traveled without you. When you started traveling together you made a game of which one of you could find the best/worst one. Despite all the traveling your job entailed, the collection was still relatively small. It wasn't often you got to more besides get off the jet, do your mission and get back on. But that only made the ones you did have all the more precious.

A hand on your shoulder brought you back to the present. You cleared your throat. "Thanks for the help today," you managed to say. "I need...yeah, I just need a minute."

You didn't look at them. You didn't have to, to know that Nat had to pull Clint from the room. She'd always been good about your space and he'd always been reluctant to leave when you were upset. They left the door open but you didn't care. There was nothing but storage on this floor and you were unlikely to be disturbed.

Your hands gripped the edges of the box and your shoulders rolled forward as you tried to curl in on yourself in your grief. Despite the time that had passed, your misery over Coulson's death was still raw. It didn't take much to drag you back into those dark days that immediately followed the loss.

Hot tears rolled down your cheeks and you left them for a bit. You weren't entirely sure if they were from grief or anger. The nature of your lives meant that your moments of normalcy were rare. Fury's tantrum had cost you a little of that and the memories that went with it. Gods, he was such an ass.

"You okay, doll?" The voice coming from the doorway startled you and you were annoyed with yourself that you hadn't heard him approaching. Sloppy.

You licked your lips tasting the salt from your tears but you didn't turn to face your soulmate. You didn't want him here. Not right now when you were already vulnerable. "I thought you were training with Steve."

There was the shuffle of a step as he moved closer. "I was. Nat came and found me. Only told me you might need me."

You huffed a laugh. "Yeah, well, she was wrong."