Little Secrets, Little Bucky

Stupid Hunters

Then came the gunshots.

Steve heard the first one and immediately went to the window. "There's a bunch of hunters out there!" He said angrily. Another shot rang out and Y/n felt rage course through her veins. It had been building since Bucky had regressed, her anger at Hydra boiling over, and there was finally an excuse to release it.

"C'mon Steve." She ran over to the door "They picked the wrong fucking day to hunt on our property."

Two more gunshots rang out as the door closed behind Y/n and her brother and Sam watched as Bucky shot up from where he had frozen on the couch and bolted into the room he shared with Y/n. Sam followed him in when he didn't immediately come out, and saw the frightened little boy curled up in the corner of the room, clutching his blankie like his life depended on it and rocking back and forth in an effort to self-soothe.

"Buck?" He called out gently, coming to crouch down beside him.

"Don' let 'em take me," Bucky begged, clearly on the verge of tears. "P'ease Uncle Sam. Can be a big boy, p'omise, I can. Bucky can be good, Bucky can try harder, jus' don' send Bucky away."

Sam got a sick feeling in his stomach as he realized that Bucky was trying to force himself out of his headspace. He got closer as Bucky begged not to be sent away, trying to tell Sam that he could 'be a big boy' if it meant that Sam would protect him. "Buck, no one's gonna take you. You don't have to be a big boy, you can be as little as you want."

Bucky violently shook his head as he burst into tears. "I don' wanna go back," he sobbed. "I don' wanna be bad again, I wanna be a good boy. P'ease, Uncle Sam, 'm not Hydra. M not Hydra, I p'omise."

Sam couldn't take it anymore and lifted the sobbing little boy into his lap, holding him close while his broken pleas devolved into harsh sobs. "I know you aren't Hydra," he whispered as gently as he could. "You're a very good boy, you were never bad, sweetheart. Hydra can't touch you here, I promise, I'll protect you. The scary noises were just hunters, no one's coming to get you." He kept up the reassurance until Bucky's sobs slowed down enough that he could finally speak again.

"Would anyone help?" He choked out, holding on to Sam's shirt like a lifeline. "Would anyone come an' save Bucky?"

"Of course we would," Sam assured him, tilting Bucky's chin up to look him in the eye. "If, by some impossible twist of fate, Hydra managed to get past me, Steve and your mama to take you away, we wouldn't stop looking or fighting until you were back home where you belong."

"Why?"

That one question broke Sam's heart in two. Y/n had spoken to him and Steve in the past about how unworthy of love Bucky felt, but he hadn't ever truly seen the depths of it. He could see now that she hadn't been exaggerating, not even a little. After all this time. Bucky still couldn't figure out why they would want to save him. "Honey, we love you," Sam said earnestly, watching as even more tears spilled over into Bucky's cheeks. "We would do anything and everything it takes to bring you home." Another hiccuping sob escaped Bucky's mouth and Sam pulled him closer in his lap, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.

"But wha' if I f'get you?" Bucky cried out, barely understandable through his sobs.

"What do you mean, kiddo?" Sam asked, running a hand up and down the baby's back.

"The chair." Bucky spit out, holding on tighter to Sam as he desperately sought security.

"Oh honey, you're never going back to that chair," Sam said quietly, trying to hold himself together as Bucky fell apart. "We won't let Hydra get you again, I promise. They can't hurt you anymore."