Delaney
"Soar high, my home. You will forever stay in my heart. Until we meet again in Paradise. I love you to the moon and back, Mahal."
Kasabay ng pagsambit ko ng mga katagang iyon ay ang pagbitaw ko sa puting lobong hawak-hawak ko.
As the last leaf slowly fell from the tree, she begin to fade away from my sight and left me where our place turn into memories.
Maybe, you're just a chapter and not meant to be my whole story. But I am so thankful that even in a small amount of time, you became part of me, my account.
Your funeral feels surreal. Faces from your past and present are suddenly all in the same place, smiling, crying, and celebrating your life. They're hugging each other and saying goodbye to you, but they haven't accepted yet that you're gone---especially me. They never really will, and maybe I will not, too. Your presence is still felt everywhere. When I squint I can almost see your fingerprints glowing on everything you touched. Doorknobs and light switches, shoelaces, and silverware. It's like you're still here, just out of reach, and your voice is still so clear, just distant, coming from another room.
Kanina pa nila ako niyayayang umalis ngunit hindi ko man lang magawang ihakbang ang aking mga paa palayo sa puntod mo.
Walang hupay ang pagbagsak ng mga luha ko mula pa ng malaman kong wala ka na. Bakit hindi mo man lang ako hinintay?
Napakabigat ng dala-dala kong sakit ngayon sa aking dibdib. Ramdam ko ang hapdi na parang tinuturok ng karayom itong aking puso sa tuwing nalalandas ang aking paningin sa iyong puntod.
Hindi ba't sinabi kong lalaban ka dahil hindi ko bibitawan ang mga kamay mo sa proseso ng iyong pagpapagaling? Hindi ba't sinabi kong alagaan mo ang iyong sarili habang wala ako para gawin iyon sa 'yo? Hindi ba't sinabi kong gagawin ko ang lahat mahanapan lang kita ng donor basta ipangako mong kakapit ka't lalaban?
But for the first time, hindi mo pinanindigan ang iyong ipinangako.
Napangiti ako ng mapait ng maalala ang note na ibinilin niya sa cabinet ko.
'I'm sorry if I didn't wait for you, mahal. Since then, I really can't do it anymore. I'm sorry if I broke my promise to you. But promise me one thing, continue your life without me. Try to love again. Look around, maybe it's just around the corner. I love you so much, take care of yourself always, Mahal.'
I don't remember when was the last time I cried this much. You have left some wonderful memories that will never fade from my heart.
No one could ever take your place in my heart. Today I am crying because I have lost someone who occupied an extraordinary place in my heart.
I wish it was a dream. I hope I will wake up sometime later and find you sitting beside me and smiling. I want you to wake me up from this nightmare.
Habang pinagmamasdan ko ang puntod nito ay naramdaman ko ang pagdampi ng malamig na hangin sa aking balat. Nagpapahiwatig na nasa tabi-tabi ka lang. Then suddenly, naramdaman kong parang may yumayakap sa akin. I slowly closed my eyes at dinama iyon. Napangiti pa ako ng malawak at siya ring pagbagsak ng mga luha ko kasabay ng pagyakap ko sa sarili.
"Guide me always, Mahal. Missing you so much already."
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