Your Side and Mine

Chapter 20

"No, I think I'm going to cool off in the pool. I'm sweating," Marin responded to my question. I lay back in her chair. She was so stubborn, but so was I. I wasn't going to chase her like a puppy.

Marin took slow steps into the pool, the waterline swallowing her with each step. I couldn't tear my eyes away. Her black swimsuit was contrasting with her tan skin, and it was going blurry as she got deeper into the water. She lay back, her bellybutton and perfect boobs bobbing along above the water. She was fucking torturous.

Sydney interrupted my self-torment by sitting against me. She looked so much older than she really was, and her face was too fake up close. She was talking about some party she'd had the weekend before. I was half listening. Then she insisted on taking a bunch of selfies, but I didn't resist. I knew they would make my mom happy if Sydney posted them—the positive PR and all. When she was done with her photo shoot of the two of us, she didn't sit back up. I resisted the urge to push her off the chair.

Marin was swimming closer to us, holding her drink above the water. I hoped she wasn't looking at us behind those sunglasses, but it didn't seem like she was. Her hair was slicked back with water, and she turned her back to us and leaned against the edge of the pool. Slade and Liv were flirting in the center of the pool. I wished I could have found another guy to come and occupy Sydney's time.

"I'm going to go sit by the pool," I told Sydney when she finally finished her story. I took my arm back from beneath her neck. I needed to get Marin to stop running away from me. I needed to ask her a question she'd have to stay and answer. I was a puppy.

"How's sophomore year?" I asked. The water was cool against my legs. As I swayed them back and forth in the water, I asked myself how many times I thought I could get away with brushing against her arm. I tried three times, but every time my left leg came close, she would somehow pull it away at just the right moment.

"Meh. Hard. I'm either the new girl or Liv's sister depending on who you're talking to," she responded. She was so much more than either of those things. I didn't understand why she felt that way. I knew that as soon as a guy got to know her it'd be a different story. My 'high school' experience was non-existent. I listened as she struggled to put her feelings into words. I started to think that maybe Marin would have liked me if I wasn't that Connor O'Quinn but a normal high schooler. She didn't like the spotlight or having attention on her. Would she hate a life with me? I thought. Before I could ask her another question, she was already trying to get away from me. At least she'd have to come back to bring me a drink.

"Yeah, I'll take an IPA. Thanks," I said.

Marin made her way to the steps. I couldn't help but watch the water drip down her body as she walked out of the water. I looked back at my feet, moving them from side to side, watching the water swirl around my legs. I caught Sydney swimming underneath the water towards me. Go away! I thought loudly. But of course, she couldn't hear me. She popped up between my knees and placed her elbows on my thighs.

"I think we should all go upstairs. We can order dinner and party up there. Liv got the penthouse," Sydney said.

Maybe I could have managed to talk to Marin alone for longer than three minutes without all those people around.

"Awesome. I'm down. But you are not controlling the music," I teased Sydney.

She playfully hit me on the chest, and I couldn't help but wonder if that was how I seemed to Marin—desperate for her attention.

"I'm going to swim for a few minutes before we go up," I said to Sydney, pulling my legs back and hopping into the water.

Get a fucking grip, Connor, I thought to myself as I enjoyed the silence beneath the water—the silence I never got above it because someone always wanted something from me. If she doesn't like you, then she doesn't like you. Give up after tonight.

When we made our way back to the cabana, Marin was drinking my beer and sitting with the girls, Spencer, and Alex. Why didn't she bring it back to me? I wondered. I didn't ask her because I didn't want to seem as distressed as I felt.

"Let's go up to the room," Sydney was telling everyone, not asking. When we got upstairs, Marin ordered pizza from room service, and the girls couldn't help but dance to the rap music Liv was blasting. I would've tried to insert myself, but they looked like they were having fun. Marin was the worst singer in a way that only made me like her more. I needed to stop gawking at her like a maniac, so I got up and went out to the balcony. After a minute, I heard the door slide open behind me.

"What're you doing out here all alone?" Sydney's voice cut through the dark. Not who I was hoping for.

"Just wanted to get some air," I said.

"It's chilly with the wind," she said, stepping towards me and wrapping her arms around my waist. As I reached down to remove them, she kissed me before I knew what was happening. My eyes closed then opened in shock, and I saw something move out the corner of my eye. Marin had come through the open door and was looking at us, eyes so narrow they looked like slits.

Fuck.

I pushed Sydney away from me.

"Sorry y'all," Marin said in horror and rushed back through the door inside.

Sydney just laughed and muttered an oops, that was awkward, not realizing how much she had screwed me over.

They had started eating the pizza on the couch when I got back inside and were deciding which movie to watch. Marin wouldn't look me in the eye, even when I sat next to her. I already knew she'd never give me a chance to explain. And she kept avoiding my arm. Jesus, she was so stubborn. Sydney kept putting her hand on my thigh, and I kept removing it. Jesus, she was so persistent.

Halfway through the movie, Marin fell asleep on Liv, her feet touching my thigh slightly. This is as good as I'll ever get, I thought to myself. When the movie was over Liv gently laid Marin's head down on the couch, and I draped a blanket over her. Slade went to party in the room with Spencer, Alex, and the other two girls, and Liv went back to her room to go to sleep. I didn't want to party with them, and Sydney wasn't making any motion to get up.

"I'll sleep on the couch. You can take that daybed," I said to Sydney.

"No, it's cool. I'm smaller anyway. I'll take the couch. You can sleep in the daybed," Sydney responded.

"Alright." I wasn't going to argue with her.

I lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, and thinking about how the entire day and night went wrong. I woke up in the middle of the night sweating and realized Sydney had climbed into bed with me after I'd fallen asleep. Jesus Christ. I quietly climbed out of bed, went down the hall, and found the couch empty. I picked up the blanket Marin had been using and covered myself after lying down to go back to sleep. It was still warm from Marin's body heat. She must have seen me and Sydney in bed together when she went into Liv's room.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.