Welcome to the Statehouse/Table Oneshots and Headcanons

The Table Human Names

(oh my god this is my longest chapter I can't even)

These are the standard human names that the states usually use when they have to hide their identities. These are also for my sake, because I need them for...reasons...fanfic reasons...

My usual pattern for naming the states is their first name starts with the first letter of their state and their last name the second letter of their acronym. Sometimes I play around with that format, for example if someone already has the two letters of their acronym I play with their last name or if a last name that doesn't follow the pattern I make their middle name follow the pattern. I try to have their names emblematic of the people that live in that state, but obviously some names I went more American with than others. The less I care about a character the less effort I will put into their name.

I did implement a rule for the "New" states that I could ignore the first part of their name if I so pleased. Although I think I only used that for one of them.

In universe the states usually don't think about their human names a lot. Either it was assigned to them or it was just the vibe they were picking up when they named themselves. Some of them do think a little bit more on their names and the meanings. If I'm writing the states as states you will almost never see their human names come up. The states don't see their human names as their real names and just as fake names.

Note: For three of these names I used Native American names in them as tributes they would pay to the Native Americans in their land. I flipped flopped back and forth on if this was a good idea or a bad one. I eventually decided to risk it but if enough people think it is insensitive and take issue with this (and their arguments are valid) I will change this. On to the names!

Alabama - Alexander Smith

- Probably has gone by Albert before, but nobody takes a guy named Albert seriously. His first human name was probably Alfred. Sometimes southern states will mess up and call him either of those names.

Alaska - Alexei Tanax̂ Morozov

- icestarphoenix on Tumblr has this headcanon name for Alaska, and while I did want to give him a different last name Morozov just WORKS really well. I added my own flair to it by giving him a middle name. Tanax̂ is an Aleut/Unangax̂ (Unangax̂ is their self-name) name meaning "land" or "place", I thought Alaska would take on a tribute name for the people he got his name from in the first place. I hope you appreciate this because I actually had to read a book to get this name. I broke my rules for this one.

- A skippable rant: If you're ever doing research, check for sources. And make sure you can verify those sources. That was a major problem I ran into trying to find a middle name for Alaska. Most Inuit names I found I could not verify the language they were from or their area of origin. That was part of the reason why I went with the Unangax̂ name because at the end of the day I could verify it and where it came from. By the way PLEASE do your research on these things. I learned through this that Inuit is not a monolith, Alaska has five major groups, the Unangas, Inupiat, Yuit, Athabascans, and the Tlingit and Haida who are categorized together, with several other communities with several different languages. Anyway, soapbox moment is over, you can return to fun State names.

Arizona - Armando Ziegler

- I gave him a Spanish name since he was originally a Mexican territory. His last name is German partially because there aren't a lot of good Z last names that are Spanish, but also because Mexico does have a German population and German is the third most spoken non English language in Arizona.

Arkansas - Archer Dubois-Johnson

- Ark switches between using Dubois and Johnson as his last name. On paperwork with his human name he'll probably just use both. Dubois because it was his last name back when he was French and Johnson because he just liked that Anglo name.