GUILTY | CONRAD FISHER

maybe, she could move on.

But her fears were not realized. Conrad was the only one person who was sitting not far from the sea when she collapsed right next to him. She saw how he wanted to start talking but she shushed him quickly. 

Edwards needed some time of comfort being with Conrad and watching how calm slowly turns into something more complicated. She was fond of the sound of waves since she was little. 

She remembered how Edwards and Haden families were sitting in the restaurant, standing on a coastline, and Sara fell asleep with her head on Francis' lap and her legs on Erik's. Last thing she heard was a wave sound. And right at that moment she felt happier than ever, surrounded by people she loved, and absolutely unaware of their fate. 

She hadn't felt like that for too long for not recognise the feeling. In spite of their arguing, Conrad was still her safe place, person who could made her live again, to experience emotions she though she couldn't experience again. 

Now, sitting on the sand, ignoring grains in her shoes, her knees were touching his. And that was exactly what she needed at the moment. Theo could talk to her for hours in her room, but Sara would stay nervous, sad and angry with herself. Conrad hadn't said a word yet but he had already made her feel out of danger, miles away from her fears and worries. Only the two of them. 

However, they had to talk. So, when Edwards looked up at the boy, he cleared his throat and started. "I'm so sorry, Sara, I shouldn't have...I..."

"Tell me one thing, Con," she interrupted him. "Was you drunk? Did you mean what you said?"

"I was pretty wasted, I think," he sorted the sand through so he didn't see a smirk on Edwards' face. 

She touched his chin and made him look directly in her eyes. As far as he wanted to turn away, he couldn't. Sara's grip turned out to be too strong for him to break out, or, he wasn't making an effort. "I was right, then. You're jealous jackass, Conrad Fisher."

He smiled slightly. "Maybe, I am. A little."

"A little," she echoed. "What happened to you?"

"It was dad," he responded, taking her hand in his. "When mom said that he won't come, I was the happiest person alive. But now...I'm the eldest y'know. Expectations he had for me, for my sport achievements, for school and other stuff. We had never had father-son talk, had never watch movies or play chess, like you and Francis. I'm not his son, I'm his project."

Now Sara understood why the two of boys treated their father so differently. "And you're mad with his coming so you decided to make a jealous scene, instead of the talk we're having now."

He nodded. "I'm so sorry. I was pissed when I saw you and Jere, then Adam's appearance. I thought, I'm losing you to him as I lost my father years ago."

"You and Jere are so similar, and none of you sees this," Conrad shot her a questioning glance. "He hadn't told me that, but I have all reasons to be sure that he thinks the same way to you. He thinks, that it is always you, Con. He loves Belly, you know that?" he nodded unsurely. Brothers had never discussed Belly in that way. The truth was, he had no idea what Jeremiah felt towards their childhood friend. "And Belly loves you. It had always been you for her, Con, not Jere. And he is suffering." 

"But it never had been Belly for me," the boy mused for some time. Then he jumped on his feet, making the girl follow him. He took both of her palms in his and looked in her green-green eyes, which he was ready to observe hours on end. "It's you for me, princess."

"What are you..."

"Please, wait. For the first time in a while, I really know what I'm talking about. Sara, you drive me crazy, since the day you and Theo showed up in front of out car, endlessly teasing Steven. I kept remembering our kiss every fucking day, S, I thought that I was going crazy. But, it seems like I'm falling for you, too."

Edwards was speechless but she knew that she had to say something. "Too?"

"Remember Belly's birthday?" she grimaced but nodded. "You said that we couldn't be friends because you started to fall for me."

"I really said that?" Conrad bowed. "I'm done with drinking," the boy laughed loudly. 

"See? You're the light I need to survive, to get the fuck out from the cave I've been in for too long. I want to be better again, to be the guy you deserve to be with."

Sara released her hand from the boyish one and cupped his cheek. "You're more than enough for me, Conrad. But we...can't."

"For the first time, choose yourself over somebody other, Sara," he whispered. "I love you, not Belly."

They went silent after the last words. "You don't mean this, Con. You didn't mean what you said."

The Fisher boy looked as confused and frightened as Sara herself. They stared at each other, both waiting for him to say something. "I-I...I think, I did. I think, I love you, Sara Edwards."

Her biggest nightmare was real. She was afraid of everything that could be caused by his words. Even though, she had a plenty of hook-ups and an impressive kiss list, she had never been in a relationship. It was the thing she thought she would never be ready for. But here she was, standing in front of boy who confessed that he loved her. 

And the worst thing in that situation was that his feelings were, for sure, mutual. She fell for him completely, she was totally and absolutely in love. 

They met only a couple of weeks ago, but she knew that the thing her and Conrad shared wasn't 'the thing' she had with people before. Every bloody moment she spent with him was a literal dream but, like, in real life. Maybe, it was her inner child speaking, but she was almost sure that she loved Conrad, too. 

"You don't know me, Con. You know nothing about the thing you're getting into."

"I know you. I know that you're fond of four cheese pizza, which is absolutely disgusting, but I'm ready to forgive you," Sara chuckled. "I know that we have the same number of freckles on out left hands, we have eight of them. You're obsessed with travelling, you toured the whole Europe and became obsessed with moving there. And you're the biggest Big Time Rush underage fangirl I've met this year."

That was so stupid, she couldn't ctop smiling. He actually memorised every thing she told him during their small talks. It was the sweetest thing she had ever heard from the boy. 

"Your test is passed, Mr. Fisher," she said. "But it isn't what I was talking about."

"What do you mean?"

"The reason why we came here this year. Why we didn't go to Europe again."

Conrad seemed to start realizing. "Steven was mad at you because you didn't tell him."

Sara nodded. "Let's make a deal. We're not making things official until I'm ready to tell you. My first relationship needs to be based on truth, on trust, right?"

Fisher's eyes widened. "I'm the first?" he asked with a sly smile.

Sara rolled her eyes. "You won't if you don't shut up, git."

He raised his hand in surrender. "Okay, deal. Not official before you're ready...Can I kiss you?"

Edwards wanted him so much to grab her by waist and kiss her deeply. "Absolutely not, Fisher!" Then, she hit him in the shoulder, and he, laughing, hugged her tightly, resting his chin on the top of her head. 

For the first time in months Sara thought that, maybe, with Conrad's help, she, actually, could grant Erik's wish. Maybe, she could move on, live her best live and, especially, spend the best summer in her life. 

Her hands were wrapped around the boyish torso. She groped the ring using the other hand and smiled in Conrad's shirt. 

Maybe, she could move on.

A/N:

i was busy preparing the most difficult edit in my life. 

now, it's out in the marauders tiktok, 

and i can finish writing this story peacefully.

CONRAD AND SARA ARE SO CUTE I CAN'T----