QINGXIN | Genshin Impact x Reader

Kamisato Ayato

〞[ to love & fall ]
character // kamisato ayato﹔
genre // angst﹔
tw // heartbreak .
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Why is love such a complicated concept to understand? Maybe it is the fact that people take such a fragile syntagma so lightly, that they tend to forget that love is not kept in absolutely all small gestures. Not every accidental touch of the fingers is meant to be something special, even if it is soft and warm when you pass someone a certain something like a simple piece of paper.

Not every gaze holds an insatiable longing. Sometimes, even if they say eyes are a mirror of the soul, not every beautiful look has that spark that makes your heart throb and your thoughts crave something more.

And sadly, not every heart is meant to find its other half. It was a beautiful morning when you realized that. Birds were chirping happily through the big cherry blossom's branches in front of your house, without a care in the world, the sweet melody caressing your ears and slowly mending your broken heart.

It was the sun shining through the pink petals and inside your lonely room that made you remember the reason you felt like this. The actual reason why tears were gathering in the corners of your eyes.

He didn't come back this time. It was the first morning in which you woke up with the empty feeling that you will never see him again. This fact would not disturb you, in fact, maybe it would have been the best to forget about him the moment he decided to step out of your home after he spent the night.

Like he usually does.

Like he used to do.

In those moments when he felt like the world was crumbling around him, the times in which he fell apart in your arms with clouded eyes and heavy sighs. You cherished the nights he would place his cheek on your chest, claiming your heartbeat as his own lullaby, and you most definitely will miss brushing your fingers through his hair.

"Would you let me braid your beautiful hair?" You used to ask when you sat together in the field full of flowers after a long day. He would give you that lovely smile of his and you would sit in silence, with him relishing the way your touch relaxed his inner chaos profoundly.

Yeah, you will certainly miss that. You would, but you will not allow yourself to lose a part of you just because he decided you are not a good reason to stay.

"It's too cold for you here," he would whisper when you got caught again in one of his dangerous missions, shivering slightly under the pale light of the moon. His right arm would try and keep you close to his chest, resting around your waist as his back was exposed to the rain. "You shouldn't be here."

He pushes you even further until your own back makes contact with a tree, eyes flickering left and right to see if he spots any enemies around, before making contact with your worried ones again.

"My apologies, Ayato," you emphasize your last word, as his fingers clutch the katana even tighter in his left hand. "But do keep in mind that I am only here because you can't seem to stop coming back to me."

His purple irises soften.

You would have appreciated his silent decision to retreat from your life. You really would have, if only he would have treated your relationship differently.

But he didn't care one bit. He walked into your life like he already owned you and planned to leave just like he came. As if you're nothing more but a tool in his own story. A side-character. Have you ever wondered why people call it falling in love and not rising in love? Could it be from how weird it sounds now that we got used to it? Or maybe it's because love is such an underestimated concept, that it can bring you more pain than happiness. You meet, you make eye contact with his gentle, yet intimidating light purple eyes, he kisses you softly, and you fall.

You finally let your walls down and he takes this opportunity to completely ruin you and your soul.

"I am not asking you to give me the moon, my lord." The polite, yet cold and distant way in which you addressed him was driving him insane. "I only ask for an explanation as of why I am suddenly being forgotten and left to cry every night for a man that does not care enough for me to give me a few moments of his precious time."

His eyes narrow at the way your voice trembled with every word that rolled off your tongue. You kept a strong facade, hands clasped together in front of your stomach, resting anxiously on the material of your clothing.

"I understand I might not be..." you inhale deeply before making eye contact with his clouded gaze, "enough for you, but I truly think I deserve to know why you suddenly decided I was not worthy of your attention anymore."

Another deep breath made you realize your lungs are not taking enough air when your gaze is stuck on him

"I might not be royalty, nor do I have blue blood or any riches on me. I don't wear expensive jewelry or bathe in the most luxurious oils. But I respect myself," the clock was ticking louder and louder with every word you said. "And I believe you should too. So do tell me why you made the decision of plucking me out of your life like a wilted flower from a garden?"

"You," his voice boomed throughout the room as he stood up, royal material of silk dancing around his ankles as a few papers slipped from his desk and onto the ground. "You are the sole reason why I chose to distance myself."

"And have you ever wondered about how I would feel about your decision?" You questioned, watching him stepping closer to you, towering over you with his intense presence.

"You may not believe me, but I did not want to break your heart-" he caressed your cheek with his finger and you felt your skin tingle from his familiar warmth.

"Look at this, you're absolutely right. I don't believe you one bit, because I chose to let you in my heart, my lord." You say through gritted teeth. "My only condition was to wipe your damned feet at the door."

When he didn't say anything, you scoffed.

"It seems like I am, after all, asking for too much. Now, if you'll excuse me. I have better things to do than continue to get insulted by your ignorant presence." You said promptly and turned around to take your leave.

"Love is a hoax," you chime bitterly as you remembered. 

That's what you thought until you heard a soft knock, hesitant and barely audible, at the door.

And when you opened it and saw him, you felt the world crashing down around you.

"Will you please give me a few minutes of your time?"

And you fell all over again. Even if he did not deserve it because at the end of the day you are, once more, all alone.

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✎••• author's note ノ
I do believe everyone has a soulmate. This was written when I was heartbroken, so please do remember it's just fiction.
↳ reyna ♡

©2022 -higashikata. do not copy, translate or repost my work.