Every Saint Needs a Sinner

11 - the movie night

When we first met I just thought she was hot and wanted to hookup with her. When it was clear that was never going to happen, both due to her disdain for me and her boyfriend, my thoughts turned to other women as I quickly realized the power I seemed to wield being on the basketball team.

I'd never committed to any single woman I casually dated in college. Sure, I wasn't as bad as Wyatt, but I definitely never sought out anything serious. Then, I didn't see the point, not while I'm young and supposed to be figuring my life out. But theses days I've been getting the strange sense that I'm waiting for something else. Though I don't know what yet.

If anything, being a bachelor all this time, has given me the opportunity to learn a few things that I didn't know in high school, and means I can freely get to know Jourdan now without someone else getting in the way. Thinking with my brain instead of my dick, as hard as it's been - literally, has actually been nice.

I enjoy Jourdan's company.

This past weekend for example, when we spent Sunday together with everyone else, smoking joints and hammocking at Chataqua park was the easiest, most platonic time I'd ever spent with a girl. Like she might be a close friend who I've grown up with.

It's odd for me to balance these two things and try to figure out what she means to me. On the one hand, she's gorgeous, smart, funny and I don't think I'll ever not be physically attracted to her. But on the other, she's also caring and sincere with me now, like a real friend would be, which makes it even more of a mind fuck.

I realize then that I'm just staring at my laptop, and haven't done any work in a couple minutes. I clear my throat, trying to shake myself out of it as Lars glances up at me.

"You good bro?" He asks and I nod.

"Yeah," I say quietly. "Just got distracted, that's all."

"Oh shit," Lars eyes widen then, looking at something over my shoulder that I can't see. I turn just in time for Penelope to reach us, her bleached hair glinting against the florescent lights above us. She's dressed in jeans and a low cut top, smiling at me as she sits in the free seat at our table.

"Hey handsome," she says softly, running her hand up my arm and I swallow hard.

"What's up?" I ask, glancing at Lars who just shakes his head.

"I am insignificant here," he grunts. "So, I'm gonna go get another coffee from the Laughing Goat. You want anything?"

He directs the question to me and I just shake my head.

"I'll take an iced chai latte since you're going down there," Penelope adds, smiling at him. "I can Venmo you, I was actually headed that way before I saw you two and decided to say 'hi'."

"Oh," Lars pauses as he stands, taking a breath. "Sure yeah, but don't worry about it, it's on me."

Then he strolls off, phone and wallet in hand, but not before passing me another wide eyed look that I ignore. I know she irritates him, and her assumption of asking him to grab her a drink probably just pissed him off. He's held a grudge since she broke that scone plate that his grandma gave him.

"So," she sighs, tilting her head to the side as she leans it against one hand, both her elbows on the table. "Where have you been? I was hoping you'd call me after last time."

"Sorry," I mutter gruffly, turning back to my laptop to click a couple answers on the next questions before I glance at her again. "Practice has been insane lately, and my course load really picked up."

"It's okay," Penelope says, still keeping her voice low. "But have you given any more thought to what we talked about last time? About how things between us should get more serious now."