close | b.e

23

omniscient

cold air filled joli's room, effectively waking her up.

coming to the realisation her window was open, she shot up, textbook falling off her chest, almost having a heart attack as she spotted a figure curled up at the bottom of her bed.

it was just billie.

why was billie in her room? and why was she in her room at...

10.

fuck.

"shit," she whispered, trying to keep her eyes open through the pounding headache she was experiencing, frantically attempting to pack her bag, waking billie in the process.

"woah," the half awake girl mumbled.

"it's ten fucking am," muttered joli, more to herself. "school started like two hours ago."

"wait, joli, calm down."

"no," she snapped, scraping her hair into a ponytail, getting increasingly irritated as it wouldn't stay. "we had that math test today, remember? it goes towards our final grade." her breathing was becoming more rapid as she fought with sudden tears. why was she crying again?

a hand was on her hair, swiping her own hands from it.

"stop."

joli ignored her, attempting to get clothes from her closet.

"joli."

"what?" she snapped again, voice louder than expected.

"look at me," billie spoke as joli tried to grab the clothes.

joli turned to look at her, anger evident on her face.

"you're not going into school."

"billie, i can't miss a day."

"sit."

"no."

"sit down."

feeling she had no choice, joli took a seat on the edge of the bed.

"i showed up at your house last night, to study for the math test. when i got here, you were already studying. we studied together for a little while, and then i fell asleep at like nine thirty. i woke up at three, you were still studying. i lay there and watched you struggle to keep your eyes open as you still continued, until you fell asleep. does that sound healthy to you?"

billie's voice had the slightest tone of anger in it, but it wasn't directed at her.

joli refused to meet billie's eye.

billie took a seat beside her, continuing to speak. "jo baby, you have to sleep. tests don't matter. well, they shouldn't come above your health."

joli finally looked up, sighing a little. "my mom's gonna yell at me," she whispered, green eyes beginning to shine with tears. she sniffed, ridding herself of them in seconds.

"you're burning up," billie spoke softly, cool hand soothing the pain in her head. joli leaned her forehead against it, closing her eyes and instantly feeling the exhaustion kick in.

"i'm tired," she whispered.

"i know."

joli opened her eyes, removing her head from billie's hand, moving her own hands to massage her temples.

"headache?"

"mhm."

"you're overworking yourself."

joli wanted to argue, but she found she couldn't.

"you can repeat the test, you know. if you miss it. you need to take time off especially if you're not feeling good, yeah?"

joli didn't answer, suddenly feeling defeated, almost like she wasn't in control of the situation anymore.

"do you want anything to eat?"

she just shook her head.

"are you sure?"

"yeah. you can get something though."

billie didn't move, studying the girl in front of her.

"stop staring," joli laughed.

billie just smiled, pulling the brunette down with her as she curled up again. their faces were almost uncomfortably close, and joli scrunched up her nose as she felt billie remove her ponytail. 

"kay. now sleep," demanded the girl in front of her.

there was a moment of silence as joli attempted to fall asleep. the anxiety she was still experiencing over missing a day of school and the emerging pain in her stomach weren't doing her any favours.

why did she get so anxious over missing one day of school? why was she driven to the point of tears over missing a test that could easily be repeated? staying up to insane hours just to study for a test she knew she'd pass easily?

what was worse was that billie had experienced her doing these things, and it felt as if she knew, even more now than ever. 

she didn't like how exposed she felt around billie, but in a way it was comforting. it was almost like billie was her rock. the person who could always tell how she really felt without joli having to tell her. she never tried to force her to talk about it, never really even mentioned it. 

she felt safe around her. seen.

she, in turn feels the same about billie. the girl who was now burning holes into her face with her stare.

joli opened her eyes, letting out a laugh at billie's wide blue ones.

"you stopped wearing mascara," was all she said, after a short moment.

"yeah," joli flushed, suddenly feeling insecure.

"so pretty," she mumbled, closing her own eyes.

"no you."

=

this chapter sucks ASS. but i had to give you guys something

i havent updated in like a month? maybe over idk

pls dont hate me i had a stressful week i even saw the billie eilish and she looked me dead in the eyes too