Till the end || Ashtray

015.

(Word count: 1181)

I watched Rue try and convince Lexi that her so called cold wasn't contagious. I knew that it wasn't a cold though, I could tell from the moment she hobbled into my house that she had relapsed and was going through withdrawal. I didn't say anything at first but I had seen this happen before, with both Rue and my dad.

At one point my mom emerged from her room and gave Rue her own set of interrogating questions. That conversation ended with my mother complaining about her 'compromised immune system'. Then Rue sprinted up the staircase claiming she needed the bathroom. I shared a look of concern with Kat as Rue held her side tightly the whole time.

I realized I was still holding my glass of water and I stepped into the kitchen. After setting my glass in the sink with a clunk I went back and slumped into the couch that was sitting behind my friends. I hadn't noticed Leslie Bennett until I glanced up at the sound of feet stumbling down the stairs. I watched my curly haired friend curse as she saw her mother leaning against the wall.

"This can't make you feel good, Rue. Livin' like this. Lying to the people you love, being mean to the people you love." Rue looked at her mom like she was stupid. "This can't make you feel good about yourself." Leslie took a breath, crossing her arms over her chest. Rue slid down the wall and leaned back into our staircase. "I don't care. Just fuckin' leave me alone, please." Rue sighed.

Leslie shifted on her feet before continuing. "I know you're in pain." She looked at her eldest daughter with a serious facial expression. "You have no fuckin' idea, Mom." Rue threw her head back, laughing incredulously. I stayed silent, hoping Leslie's tactics would work. I really did care for my friend.

Leslie took a breath and went on to talk again. "Let's get back into the car, and let me take you to the hospital." She pleaded, you could tell she was on the verge of breaking down and crying. Her daughter winced in pain as she grabbed her side tighter. "I can't get clean." She paused to shake her head. "I can't do that shit forever." She finished, staring daggers at her own mother. I could just make out the sweat beads resting all over her nauseated face.

Cassie took a step closer to the stairs, seeing as she was standing with her arms crossed by the hallway table. "You don't have to. Just.. take it one day at a time." She said sweetly. She looked to all of us for support, Suze, Maddy, Kat, and I nodding in reassurance. Cassie then looked back at Rue. "Yeah." Leslie butted in again.

"Hey Cass?" Rue said in a strange tone of voice. "Yeah?" Cassie responded with the same sweet smile, looking innocent as ever. "I have a quick question for you." "What?" She looked genuinely confused. "How long have you been fucking Nate Jacobs?" Rue said immediately, her stature as confident as ever. I practically screamed, throwing my hand over my mouth. I read Kat's mind and jumped up to grab Maddy's hand.

My eldest sister laughed nervously, looking around the room before connecting her eyes back with Rue. "Wh-what, what, what are you talking about?" Her face grew a crimson red as her breathing accelerated. "I just, I really want to know how long you've been fucking Nate." Rue glared at Cassie. "I'm not-" she laughed. "What? I'm not." She looked at Maddy, who was shaking right now. "What're you talking about?!" Maddy finally spoke, dragging Kat and I across the wooden floor.

We tried to hold her back but it was really no use. "Oh I- I just saw her get in his truck, kiss him, and drive off." Rue threw her hands up in surrender. Maddy laughed manically. "What that was like a, a month ago?" Rue looked up to the ceiling in thought. I looked from Lexi to my other sister. She had moved away from Maddy out of freight. Maddy stepped closer, getting in her face. "Are you kidding me?!" She shouted.

Kat spoke for the first time that night. "Cass that's like.. really bad." She stated like none of us comprehended that part. At this point Maddy was screaming in Cassie's face. "You're fucking Nate? Are you kidding me?!" "No, I don't know why she would say that." Cassie pointed at Rue, crying now.

Then my mom and Leslie got onto both of them, but Maddy didn't listen. "Oh you're crying?! You're fucking crying?! You're the most self-centered, idiotic person I know." She was snapping her fingers together now, her nails clinking in sound. "You fuck my ex, and you're fucking crying?!" Cassie was balling now.

"Look, I don't care who's fuckin' who. Okay?" Leslie tried to stop the confrontation. "Umm Cass, do you wanna go for a walk maybe?" Lexi tried her turn at helping. "Rue, when was this?" Maddy glanced at Rue quickly. "Right after New Years." She was just above a whisper now. "Oh! You dumb fucking bitch, I'm gonna fuck you-" She was stopped from finishing her sentence by Cassie sprinting up the stairs. Somewhere along the line Rue had managed to run from everyone.

-

I think one of the most heart breaking things I've ever witnessed was Maddy leaning against the bathroom door with tears in her eyes. My heart broke to pieces as she tried to ask Cassie if it was worth it.

I ended up helping Kat escort Maddy down the stairs and to her car. She reassured me she would get her home alright before they both left. I slowly walked back into the house, finding Lexi sitting on the floor in the kitchen. "Hey." I said quietly, sitting right beside her. "What the hell just happened?" She said out of breath. Her shocked eyes were directed to the floor. I huffed a sigh out. "I don't know." I shook my head a bit.

She looked at me and nodded. "Alright well I'll come find you later Lex, good night. Get some rest." I smiled, even after everything that happened. I stood up and tip toed up the stairs to Cassie's room.

She was sitting on her bed now, crying. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" I scared her a bit. "Not you too, go away!" She screamed, throwing her hands in the air like a maniac. I scoffed, crossing my arms. "Shut the fuck up Cassie, you lost all right to talk to anyone when you decided to get with that fuckface!" I yelled even louder. She cried with a mixture of laughing. "You know what? Whatever just don't ever fucking think about talking to me or Lexi.. or Maddy ever again." I threw my hands to my sides, storming out of the room.

I could hear her cry even louder afterwards. But I didn't care, Lexi and I slept in my room that night.