Falling for a Maximoff

Chapter 37: Insecureties and love

One finger traces over the spot on my upper arm where a small scar forms from when they tasered me. The hand wanders down my shirt until I get to the hem of it. Slowly I pull it up a little, exposing my stomach. I notice the slight abs that started to grow but my eyes stick to the new scar where I got hit by the knife. Even though Yelena took care of it, it still scared.

A tear drops down my cheek and my hand shivers when it brushes over the scar.
I look terrible. My whole face is covered in bruises and the rest of my body isn't looking much better. The scars look ugly and remind me of the time there. How can people even look at me? How can Wanda wanna be close to me?

Another tear rolls down my cheek, followed by another one. My thoughts start to spiral and every second I look at the bruises and scars, I start to dislike it more and more.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Wanda asks softly, coming up to me. She watches me through the mirror. I try to form a sentence but my throat feels too closed off for that.
"Deep breaths, okay?" She gently turns me around to look at me and my eyes meet hers that are filled with worry. Wanda takes a deep breath, holds it a few seconds and lets it out again. The next time I breathe with her, still shaking a little. But looking into her eyes and breathing with her helps to calm me down and I feel like I can talk again, the tears also almost gone.

"Wanna tell me what happened?" Wanda asks again, searching my eyes for an answer.
I turn around to face the mirror and connect my eyes with hers again.
"I haven't seen my face in a while and seeing it like this...it looks ugly. And so do my arms...and my stomach." I whisper, pulling my shirt up again and showing her the scar. Her expression grows a little sad.

"You're not ugly, y/n. You are beautiful. I know it's hard and connected to memories but they are just bruises and they will go away. Soon it's gonna be just like before. And even if it wouldn't I still like you and I love to look at your face, no matter how much it changed or not. And I don't think you look ugly at all, I promise." Wanda softly replies, holding my gaze and stepping a bit closer.

"But it looks so bad and different to my usual face." I state.
"It doesn't look bad. Sure, it shows the mistreatment you had to suffer through but it doesn't make you less beautiful. And you will see, it will all heal." She assures me.
I nod, accepting that but my eyes drop to my stomach again.

"But some scars won't go away." I whisper again, feeling the tears build up in my eyes again.
"Everyone has scars, there's nothing bad about that. Please don't think that I wouldn't like you if you have scars. I don't mind them, they are a part of you that you can't change. Please, don't get insecure about them." She says, sounding honest. I swallow, my eyes still glued to my stomach.

"Don't they scare you or anything? They really don't look pretty." My voice even more quiet now, a tear running down my cheek again.
"No, sunshine. No. They don't scare or put me off at all. I love you just the way you are and your whole body. Nothing about it would ever scare me." She assures me, her hands grazing over my sides, slowly over my shirt down to my stomach where my own hand lies.

Goosebumps form under her touch and a warmth spreads through my body.
Her hands rest on the upper side of my stomach and she makes eye contact with me, silently asking for consent. I nod.
Her hands slowly move more upwards until they reach the scare. One hand takes mine in hers while the other gently traces over the scar on my stomach, careful so she doesn't hurt me.

Her fingers leave a trail of warmth on my skin and it feels great how her fingers graze over my body. She looks concentrated, her eyes on my stomach through the mirror and following her fingers. They circle the scar a few more times and somehow her touch relaxes me and I lean back a little, feeling her behind me. Our intertwined hands wrap around my upper body and she hugs me while continuing her route on my stomach.

I feel relieve shooting through my body, her actions showing me that she really isn't put off by the scar and what connects to it. She accepts me the way I am and that means incredibly much to me in this moment. I don't have to hide from her and can be fully myself and honest, knowing she won't run from me. Her hand comes to a rest and lays on my stomach, her eyes meeting mine again and she smiles softly, placing a kiss on my cheek.

"See, nothing that scares me about it. You are just as perfect as you were before." She states with a genuine smile and I slowly turn around to face her. Her hand slides from my stomach to my back and she lets go of my other hand to tug some hair behind my ear.
"Thank you." I say quietly, holding our eye contact.
"Of course, I just hope you know at least a bit more how much I appreciate you and I mean everything about you." She answers and I nod.

"I do and I can't tell you how much this means to me right now. And please know that the same goes for you, there is nothing I don't love about you and for me you are perfect." I tell her, watching her blush in the slightest.
"Thank you." She bites her lip a little, playing with the hair between her fingers.

"Did you really mean it?" I ask after a while of getting lost in her eyes.
"What?" She asks back, a tiny bit confused. Now I'm the one getting nervous and my hands that are behind her back start to fiddle.
"You said you love me just the way I am...did you mean that? Do you love me?" I ask shyly, scared I understood it wrong and to get turned off.

Her eyes fill with slight surprise and I'm not sure what that means. She swallows and shortly looks away before she looks back at me and nods a little bit.
"Yes, I meant it. It kinda just slipped in the moment and I didn't even realize it. Not because it's not true but because I wanted to wait for a better moment to tell you." She rambles a little bit, blushing.
My heart fills with happiness and excitement.

"You don't have to say it back though, I know it's pretty early on." She adds, chewing on her lip and looking down.
"Doesn't matter if it's early or not, as long as that's how you feel. And I feel the same. I love you, Wanda." I answer, a little surprised myself but if I'm being honest, deep down inside me I already knew I loved her.
"And I don't just say that because you said it. I really mean it."

Her eyes still looking down, so I softly lift her chin with my hand and our eyes meet. I'm surprised to see tears in her eyes and worry fills my heart but then she smiles.
"I love you, y/n." She says a little louder, a wide smile on her face and tears of joy in her eyes.
"I love you, Wanda." I reply, watching her eyes light up. Her lips tremble a little and I lean in and kiss her, feeling the tremble on my own lips. But they stop withing seconds and she kisses me back, pulling me even closer. Well, this took a little bit a different turn than I thought.

A/n: There are the three magic words :D
Also to everyone: You are perfect just as you are and you are enough without having to change anything <3

Thanks for reading and love to you all <3