The Grand Princess

TGP Chapter 14: Rescued

"This life was beginning again, but Li Rong was still the same Li Rong back then."
________

Human regret was a very complicated thing.

He couldn't tell how many things were involved in that regret either.

Maybe he had a liking for her, but perhaps for the most part, at that moment, he knew that he had lost Li Rong, his wife, forever.

Li Rong wasn't just someone he might have liked. She also represented the happy family he might have had.

If he had known how to be a good husband back then, known how a man should act after getting married, and understood how to take on his own responsibilities, he would have figured out what he should and should not be involved in. Perhaps he and Li Rong would have originally had children long ago and lived happily together.

This kind of remorse reached its peak when he learned that Li Rong and Su Rongqing were together.

He quarreled with Li Rong. Li Rong gave him a slap, and he also shoved Li Rong. It could be said that they showed the ugliest sides of themselves to one another. Li Rong scolded him for being cowardly and useless. He scolded Li Rong for lacking morals and debauchery. They hated each other. For the longest time, they clashed and fought whenever they met. He felt that this woman was bitterly unreasonable, self-indulgent and depraved yet perfectly indifferent; she felt that he was ruthless, cunning and extremely petty.

After quarreling all these years, he could no longer remember what Li Rong was like back then. Even if he couldn't remember, he felt that he might have also liked her in the beginning too.

Later in life, the two of them were allies that discussed political affairs in front of one another, but at the same time, they couldn't understand each other's behaviors and were wary of each other.

In the very beginning, when he saw her and Su Rongqing together, he felt reluctant, regretful and pained. However, later on, when he saw them, there was nothing but a bit of numbness and sense of an eyesore.

Because the two of them could lean on the other and accompany one another, even if Su Rongqing killed Li Rong in the end, Pei Wenxuan knew very well that Su Rongqing was sincere towards Li Rong before he decided to act.

The two of them had gone through 25 years of a lifetime, but he had always been alone, a lone silhouette from beginning to end.

Every time he saw children and a warm, happy family, he would feel empty inside. Sitting in a friend's house with many children around would make him feel a little stifled.

The older he got, the easier it was for him to recall some of the moments of his youth. He clearly remembered that Li Rong used to lie with him on the same bed, thinking about how many children they would have and whether he wanted a boy or a girl.

He used to resent Su Rongqing and felt that he had stolen his happiness from him. However, now that Su Rongqing wasn't the Su Rongqing of those days and Li Rong had also become 18 year old Li Rong, he looked back and realized that it wasn't actually anyone's fault that he had walked down this path in life. The person who was most responsible was none other than himself.

If he could start over again in this life, he wanted to live happily with Li Rong and become a good husband.

However, this life was beginning again, but Li Rong was still the same Li Rong back then.

He will never have the wife who was wholeheartedly devoted to him at the age of 18, so he had lost interest in this marriage, despite knowing that it was inevitable.

Pei Wenxuan's thoughts were all over the place, and he proceeded to fall asleep.

They slept all night until dawn. They gradually woke up in the midst of the early morning chilliness.