𝓥𝓲𝓸𝓵𝓮𝓽

Stress ❼

My hand struggles to move across my page. Nothing I make satisfies my needs, every sketch ends up being toss into the recycling. 

My paint brushes glides across my canvas too. But even then, the colours don't react the way I want to. 

Nothings working the way I want it to.

How can this be?

Like this I'll never make it into Tokyo University.

Like this, I'll never make my mothers dream come true.

I've failed my mom, the only person who believed in me.

I've failed her.

I've lost all hope.

Nothing I draw or paint looks like how I wanted it too.

Tokyo University will never accept me.

My hands tremble, and my eyes fill up with tears. I can't stop shaking.

Someone
Please
Get
Me
Out
Of
This
Hell
Hole
Called
Reality

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wailing, I go over to my bed and punch my pillow. I may be over reacting, but I'm a perfectionist. Having an art block is NOT my thing. I absolutely hate this. But there's a reason why I'm overreacting right now. My mother has always dreamed of going to art school. But gave up on that dream to go do a more sustainable job.   So when she found out that I enjoyed doing art at a very young age, it was both of our priority to get me into art school. But then once she died, my life began going downhill. Dad seemed to no longer care for me, and married a new woman. With her, they would go and have fun doing all kinds of stuff. Vacations, date nights, you name it. There was no time for me. I was invisible to them. Now since university is coming, they're top goal is to get me into a school where I can stay in a dorm and live on my own.

I shove my face into my pillow case, where my tears soak up and absorb into my pillow. I'm so sensitive, crying over this dumb reason. But, I can't seem to help it... Slowly but surely I fall into a deep sleep, hoping to never wake up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~In the morning ~~~~~~~~~~~
The suns up, and even though I was still tired, I rolled out of bed for cram school. Man why'd I choose to go in the morning ughh.

I head to the bathroom and splash cold water onto my face and look at myself in the mirror. My eye bags look worse than usual. Oh well, I'm sure no one will notice. I have to get to school anyways.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~At School~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I can barely stay awake, what time did I even sleep at? Ugh, doesn't matter I have Highschool graduation soon and my friends want me to wear something fancy. They said we should all wear something fancy for our graduation and then go out for dinner once we're done. I have a few outfits in mind for this occasion.

(Choose whichever of these outfits or your own idk)

"So Y/n how's that boy from the cafe~" My friend teases me. But I couldn't help but to blush a little because of how flustered I was.

"H-How did you know" I asked but they juts winked and continued on with their work. I lay me head down and was about to doze off, until my phone buzzes.

YATORA YAGUCHI 🎨:
Hey! Wanna meet up :)

"Y/N. GIVE ME YOUR PHONE KNOW AND PICK IT UP AT THE END OF THE DAY" My teacher yelled at me. Great.

~~~~~~~~~~School finally ends~~~~~~~~~~~
Y/N CHISAIKI:
Hii sorry for the late response my phone got taken away Σ(-᷅_-᷄๑) Anyways sure where do you wanna go?

I sent the text and laid on my bed. I got home late because my teacher gave me a full on lecture on how my phone should have been in my bag. Stupid teacher his lesson was SOOO boring but whatever.

YATORA YAGUCHI 🎨:
Haha it's fine I'm bit of a delinquent myself if you know what I mean ;)) Anyways wanna go to that cafe at Shibuya? The one you went with your friends the other day

Y/N CHISAKI:
OMG YESS I LOVE THAT PLACE

YATORA YAGUCHI 🎨:
Cool I'll see you today at 6

WAIT WHAAT. THATS IN AN HOUR AND IM STILL IN MY SCHOOL UNIFORM.

I throw on a nice hoodie with some baggy jeans, and quickly wash up and grabbed my wallet. If I make it in time, I can catch the next train to Shibuya!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Authors Notes ‼️

So umm sorry that the chapters are coming WAY slower than before. My brain isn't thinking of any ideas at the moment and with school and stuff I sorta forgot 🤠 so enjoy this extra long chapter!!