I miss feeling the warmth of his face against mine. The comfort of knowing someone was caring for me throughout my mother slowly withering away from an illness so severe she couldn't function. I've been trying to find someone who can fulfil that empty love that Ive been missing my whole life.
Each boyfriend I've had never seemed to understand and felt uncomfortable every time I explained it to them. Laying beside him in my bed, staring at the blank white ceiling as I told him about the gunshots and screaming in pain. The shifting of his body as he got up to leave me in shock. The expression as his face met mine, like my father's splattered in my mother's blood, just pure shock. Like he couldn't believe what he had just done.
I was five, wearing my princess nightgown on a school night. His gun clattered to the floor and he bent over her limp body, sobbing. I remember his tears almost as vividly as the police slamming him against a wall and the comforting whispering of an officer as I was asked about what I saw, and lead out of the house. I didn't know that last glance at my childhood home would be last time I'd ever see it again.
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The Playlist of Traumas
Short StoryA girl tells her most horrible traumas and the story of her life through short paragraphs inspired by different songs. TW: suicide, rape, sh, intrusive thoughts, murder, shooting, abuse spotify- fionnaj the playlist is called "🤷🏼♀️"
