Opposites Do Attract (a Dazai x Kunikida fanfic)

Chapter 2: Chuuya vs Dazai (again)

It was a bit later in the day, and the effects of the mushroom had finally (mostly) worn off of Dazai, but that didn't mean he stopped bugging Kunikida (let's be honest, would he really be Dazai if he didn't bother Kunikida every chance he got?).

Speaking of, the poor soul had not gotten that much paperwork done because of Dazai, and if he was being honest, that did frustrate him. Was it too much to ask to be able to work a bit without distractions?

"Kuuuunnnniiiiikkkkiiiiiiiiddaaaaaa," Dazai said for what felt like the millionth time.

Kunikida sighed and turned to look at his frustrating coworker. "What is it now, Dazai?"

"You spend way too much time on that boring paperwork," Dazai announced.

Is he serious right now?! Kunikida thought. "Well, maybe I wouldn't have to if a certain someone didn't distract me every single chance he got."

"Someone's been distracting you? How mean," Dazai commented.

"It. Was. You," Kunikida replied. I won't lose my cool, I definitely won't...

"I have no memory of doing such a terrible thing," Dazai announced.

"Yeah well, you did," Kunikida insisted.

Dazai gave Kunikida the puppy-eyes look. "Pleeeeaaaaaaassseeeeee don't be mad at me..."

He really went there, didn't he? Now it's harder to be mad at him...he knew what he was doing...wait, why is it suddenly so much harder to be mad at him than usual? Kunikida thought. "I didn't say I was."

"But you probably are," Dazai insisted.

"Well...I am a tiny bit frustrated," Kunikida admitted.

"See? You are mad at me! WHHHYYYY? What have I done to deserve this?!" Dazai whined.

Kunikida was trying not to lose his patience. "Maybe I wouldn't be mad if you stopped trying to distract me from doing what needs to be done."

"I'm sorry, Kunikida. I'll stop, I promise," Dazai replied.

Yeah, right. "Ok, make sure you keep that promise." Kunikida got back to work.

Right at that moment, Chuuya entered the room. "Hey, Kunikida."

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! MONSTER!!!!!!!!!" Dazai screamed, climbing under Kunikida's desk.

Well, so much for him not distracting me. Not like I'm surprised, though, Kunikida thought. He glanced down at Dazai, and then back at Chuuya. "Hey, Chuuya."

"Kunikida, protect me from that scary monster..." Dazai begged, looking really scared.

Chuuya looked confused. "Uh...what's wrong with the waste of bandages? Did he just call me a monster?"

"He ate a mushroom earlier, and I guess he's still seeing things," Kunikida replied.

"I'm afraid I don't follow," Chuuya said.

"Basically, he thinks you're a jealousy monster because he's assuming you're still jealous over the way he and I got along back when I had amnesia," Kunikida explained.

Chuuya scoffed. "What kind of jealous being does he take me for?!"

Kunikida shrugged. "I guess he was traumatized by how jealous you got."

"Oh really? Well maybe I should traumatize him further..." Chuuya declared with an evil grin.

"Not a good idea, Chuuya..." Kunikida advised.