Love Sick

Chapter 9 - Something has Shifted

"Maria, is everything okay?"

I snapped back to attention. All eyes in the room were on me; even Micah was awake and staring at me expectedly.

Dr. Hanks lightly prodded again, "Maria? Everything okay?" I shook my head to erase the flood of information that I couldn't make sense of. I was diagnosed with TTP and needed to have immediate treatment. Seconds ago, I hung up the phone with my husband, who was hopped up on drugs in Las Vegas, begging me to drive three hours to pick him up.

Micah and I made eye contact, and a powerful surge of clarity flowed through me. I turned to look at my doctor, "Dr. Hanks, I'll do whatever you say." With a nod, Dr. Hanks handed me the hospital paper work to fill out and left to prepare for my life-saving treatment.

"What's going on?" my mom asked as soon as Dr. Hanks shut the door.

I filled my mom in on what Tom told me. He had snorted something at a club and was out of control, gambling away our savings. My mom covered Micah's ears as she let out a tirade of curse words and insults about Tom. I was too angry, exhausted and confused to even attempt to defend my husband. Either way, at the moment, he deserved it.

"Okay, call your dad," my mom decided.

"Dad?"

"Yes," my mom nodded confidently. "He'll go get him. I know he'll do it, and he'll be nice when he has to be and tough when he needs to." I immediately knew that she was right, so before Dr. Hanks could return, I called my dad. Quickly, I rehashed the details of Tom's ridiculous situation. Before my dad could focus on Tom's dilemma, I had to let him know that I was going to start immediate treatment for this sickness called TTP. My poor dad. He sounded like he didn't know which way to go and how to feel. He wanted to come support me but then knew that Tom needed help, too. Likewise, he was scared for me but also felt angry and sympathetic towards Tom. My dad said he would leave for the three-hour drive to Vegas right away and promised to call or text with any updates.

After hanging up with my dad, a nurse poked her head back into the office to suggest that I nurse Micah before starting my plasmapheresis. Apparently, some of the medication needed for the treatment wouldn't make it possible for me to breastfeed anymore. I nursed Micah while I called Tom again.

Tom answered without saying a word.

"Tom, are you there?" I glanced nervously at my mom.

"I'm here," he said. His voice sounded monotone, exhausted and void of emotion.

"How are you feeling?" I asked.

Tom sighed, "I'm here." He said it as if he would rather not be.

"My dad is coming out to get you."

"Why!" Tom shrieked. "I want you!" He started breathing heavily and mumbling under his breath.

I immediately turned my body away from my mom so I couldn't see her. I knew that if I looked at her, I would cry.

"Tom, I have to be at the hospital right now," I said slowly and clearly. "I'm sorry, but I love you and my dad will be there in a couple of hours."

I listened to the sound of Tom breathing on the other line.

"Can you do something for me?"

Silence.

"Tom, can you go to bed and stay there again? Put your phone volume on high and just wait there for my dad," I carefully instructed him.

"Yes," Tom finally responded. "Yes, I will."

"I love you," I said again.

"You too," he said. We hung up and I exhaled as I turned towards my mom.