I Wanna Be Yours (Jean Kirstein x Fem! Reader)

Fourteen (14) - The Right Person

"Well, you're okay now. Your fever had gone down, and your wounds are not severe. You just have to rest more so your broken ribs won't get worst." Hanji said while writing on her paper.

She's sitting on a chair that she put beside Y/n's bed. The h/c girl have finally woken up after three days of her deep sleep. She finished eating a meal and drank her herbal medicine.

But Y/n have been quiet ever since.

"Oi, brat. Aren't you gonna say anything? Did you break your jaw that you can't even open your mouth to talk?" Levi sarcastically asked.

He's standing and leaning on a wall while his arms are crossed over his chest. "Levi. Please." Erwin said.

The blond-commander is beside Hanji and have been staring at his niece with worry and concern. Levi clicked his tongue and shook his head.

"Stop blaming yourself. And don't regret your decisions, Y/n. It's not your fault." Erwin spoke. Y/n's eyes widened. She stared at her hands that's gripping tightly on her blanket.

Her eyes became glossy. She's been thinking about it. The deaths of her co-trainees and comrades. It's still crystal clear on her mind, how the Alpha squad of the Garrisons were eaten by the titans, how some of her co-trainees died, too. And Marco...

She heard about what happened to Marco. Right after waking up, Y/n asked a soldier to check on a boy named Marco Bott, and when the soldier came back, all she knew is that Marco Bott of the 104th training corps is one of the deceased 104th trainees.

"Uncle...do you feel this way, too? The...weight of carrying the burden of many soldiers' wasted lives...it's...too heavy to take" Y/n said.

Erwin's eyes widened a bit.

Tears streamed down to Y/n's cheeks, she shut her eyes and gritted her teeth. "It was my fault. I shouldn't have suggested that strategy! And now a lot of people died! I was--!!"

"Y/n!"

Y/n stopped panicking when Erwin shouted her name. Hange and Levi were shocked, it's the first time they heard Erwin shouted, sounding mad.

The h/c girl looked at her uncle.

She gulped upon seeing the anger on her uncle's face.

"It won't make a difference! Even if you didn't suggest that strategy to retake Trost district, a lot of people will still die! Soldiers, trainees, or even civilians casualties will still occur! It's inevitable! This world we're living is dangerous! Humanity could be wiped out anytime. Even now! So it won't make a difference! It's not your fault! Why?! Did you want your comrades to be eaten?!"

Y/n just stared at her uncle with wide eyes. She just woke up and here she is getting her ass scolded by her uncle.

While Hange and Levi wre amused because Erwin just snapped at his niece. It's not funny, but surprising.

"You know it to yourself. It's not your fault. You're just thinking that because you feel devastated by the deaths of your comrades. But it's not your fault. Do you know who to blame?" Erwin asked.

Y/n didn't answer

"It's the titans! Where did they come from? Why do they exists? Why do they devour humans? You, me or anyone else don't have the answers. None of us do. You don't know a lot of things, but will you just sit there and kept on crying, blaming yourself? Will you just stay behind and mourn for them? Do nothing for your dead comrades? Do you think blaming yourself will give their deaths meaning? Absolutely not, Y/n!"

Tears keeps streaming down to Y/n's cheeks. She let go of her clenched fists and just closed her eyes.

Honestly, I don't want to listen to his sermons right now...