Waves After Waves ( Love Of Attraction Series 1)

KABANATA 2

I want to calm down, pero hindi ko magawa. They were all covered in blood, including me, but I didn't feel any pain. I wanted to shout and ask for help, but no voice came out.

Hindi ko alam kung nasaan kami basta ang alam ko lang nasakop na ang sistema ko ng matinding takot at kaba. It was so dark around me that I could see nothing except my duguan and unconscious colleagues. Hindi na ako maawat sa pag iyak takot na takot ako. My heart is pounding so hard that it feels like I'm running a marathon.

"Nicole?! Are you okay? You're having a nightmare. I'll call the doctor!" Nagpapanic na boses ni Maia ang gumising sa akin sa masamang panaginip. Hinihingal pa ako  at pawis na pawis, basa rin ng luha ang aking mga mata. Napayakap ako sa kanya at humagulhol.

"Don't l-leave m-me please." Tanging nasabi ko habang umiiyak. "D-don't leave me."

"Shaks! Tinatakot mo ako! Are you okay? I'll call the doctor, I'll be right back."

"N-no no no, please don't leave me! I'm s-scared." Pigil ko sa kanya ulit.

"O-Oo s-sige. Tatawagan ko nalang si ate Tine." Nagpapanic niyang saad.

Dumating si Christine kasama niya si doctora Vidal. Agad nila akong nilapitan at niyakap ako ni Christine.

"You okay?" She asked worriedly..

"Yeah." Sagot ko.

"Sigurado ka?" Tumango ako.

"Christine.."

"Hmm? Do you need something?"

"A-anong nangyari sa mga kasamahan ko?" Tanong ko.

"Uhm..." Si Christine.

"I wanna know. Please tell me."

Napansin ko na nagkatinginan silang tatlo. I could see the hesitation on Christine's face. Napa iling naman si Dra. Vidal. Kaya mas lalo akong nanlumo.

"I want to know what happened to them, please!" My tears began to flow again. "Kung ang kalagayan ko ang inaalala ninyo then I don't care!"

"Nicole,  I-I'm sorry... " Si Christine. Naiiyak na din.

"Please." Mahinahon ngunit mariin ang pagkakasambit ko. "T-Totoo ba na...?"

"Nicole." Si Christine ulit.

"Please! I want to know!"

"Uhm, hija, maybe you need to rest first. It's not good that you're forcing yourself dahil baka mabinat ka." Si Dra. Vidal.

"Habang nagpapahinga ako, I feel even worse thinking about what happened to my friends! Don't you understand that?!"

"Nicole, calm down please." Si Christine na nagmamakaawa na.

"I can't calm down! I just wanna know what happened to my friends. That's all I'm asking! So please! Tell me."

"They're all dead." Mahinahong sabi ni Christine. I shook my head and cried even more. "Nicole, they're gone. Hindi sila nakaligtas sa accident." She continued while crying.

"No." Tanging nasambit ko. Nawawalan ako ng lakas.

"You're lucky dahil nakaligtas ka."

"W-Wala man lang akong nagawa! I-I didn't even save them..." I said full of remorse. "Kasalanan ko ang lahat! It's all my fault kung bakit sila namatay! I didn't save them! I'm so selfish!" Niyakap ako ni Christine ng mahigpit habang umiiyak. Totoo naman eh! Napakamakasarili ko!

"Shhh. It's not your fault. Wala kang kasalanan kaya huwag mong sisihin ang sarili mo." Aniya habang tinatahan ako. Umiling ako.

"Kung alam ko lang na mangyayari ang lahat ng 'yon, s-sana...sana hindi ko nalang sila p-pinilit na u-umuwi. Sana nag stay na lang kami doon edi sana buhay pa silang l-lahat! Kasalanan ko ang lahat! It's all my fault!" Hindi na ako maawat sa pag iyak. Muli akong niyakap ni Christine habang hinahagod naman ni Maia ang likod ko.

"Hanga po talaga ako sa inyo direk! Kaya botong boto ako sa inyo para kay Nicole eh!"

"Maya!" Pagalit kong saad ng marinig ang sinabi niya sa harapan ni Derik Adrian. Nagising ako dahil sa ingay ni Maia.

"Pasensya na, nagising ka ata namin." Nahihiyang sabi ni Adrian.

"Dir--- Adrian." Sambit ko.

"Uhm, do you need anything, Nics? Do you want something to eat? Sabihin mo lang para mabili namin." Sabi ni Christine habang nakangiti. Umiling lang ako.

"All right, basta kung may kailangan ka tawagin mo lang kami dito lang kami sa labas." Sabi niya. Tumango lang ako.

"How are you feeling?" Tanong ni Adrian ng mapag-isa kami sa loob ng silid ko.

"Okay na ako." Sagot ko sa kanya.

"That's good. Uhm ...pasensya ka na at ngayon lang ako nakabisita." Medyo nahihiya niya pang saad.

"It's okay, I understand."

"Namatay si Papa kaya...ah… ngayon lang ako—."

"Your dad...what?" Putol ko sa sasabihin niya sana.

"He passed away last week, so..."

"I'm sorry to hear that. Condolence." Medyo nataranta kung saad.

"It's okay, thank you." He said. "Uhm... May gusto ka bang kainin? Just tell me." Pag-iiba niya sa usapan.

"Are you okay?"

"I need to be okay para kay Mommy. Masakit pero pinipilit ko. How about you" Tanong niya. I averted my eyes and smiled sadly.

"Magsisinungaling ako kung sasabihin kong oo," I honestly said. "I can't accept what happened to my friends. Because of me...nawala sila."

"Shhh... it's not your fault."

"No, it's my fault. If I hadn't forced them to come home that night, they would still be alive today." My tears started to flow pero agad ko rin 'yong pinunasan.

"No, you're not to blame for what happened. It was an accident—"

"We wouldn't have had an accident if I hadn't forced them to go home that night." I could no longer stop my tears from flowing.

"Don't blame yourself." Sabi niya. Sinalo niya ang luha sa mga mata ko gamit ang kanyang daliri. "Wala kang kasalanan." He whispered and hugged me. I feel less pain in my chest because of what he did. "The important thing is, you're alive. You survived." Tumango lang ako. "I don't know what to do if something bad happens to you. When I heard the news, I feel like I've been poured on cold water. I'm really praying that you're okay, and nothing bad happened to you." He said.

"T-Thank y-you."

"Kaya huwag ka nang umiyak...hindi mo ginusto ang nangyari. Walang may gusto sa nangyari. It's all an accident, don't blame yourself." He said.

"Pe-Pero ... I can't help but think ... na...na... Ako ang puno't dulo ng lahat,  because ... because if I hadn't forced them na umuwi that night, sana... sana hindi nangyari ang aksidente ... At sana...they're still alive until now."

"No no no ... Hindi mo ginusto ang nangyari. It's not your fault. Huwag mong sisihin ang sarili mo… please. I don't want to see you hurt." He said looking up at me. I could see the redness on his face down to his neck. "Dahil importante ka sa akin  at ayoko na nakikita ka na nasasaktan."

Napayakap ako ng mahigpit sa kanya. Pakiramdam ko safe ako sa mga bisig niya.