The Beast

The Beast (28)

With that thought, I gave it my all to rip my arm away from his touch, inching even farther away from him on the big bed. It was so difficult for me to do this, but he needed to stay away from me, he needed to be safe. And it didn't matter if it means that he'd end up hating me and leaving me alone, as long as Vladimir wouldn't hurt him.

As long as he'll be kept alive.

But what I didn't expect to happen was when his thinning restraint finally snapped, and all the control he had on his desperately kept emotions finally disappeared.

Releasing a low growl, he trapped me between his thick arms, allowing no room for me to escape. His jaw clenched, and his worried gaze melted into one of frustration. But I couldn't find it in me to reach out and comfort him, telling him that it'd be okay.

Because it wasn't okay.

Everything was a mess.

Startling me, he grabbed a hold of my chin, forcing me to meet his dark, angry gaze head-on. Not being able to help the fear clouding my senses, I allowed him to keep me still as I tried to convince myself to keep the tears at bay.

I've cried so many times before....

But crying never solved anything.

His tousled, unkempt hair fell over his forehead messily, longer than it usually is. His lips were pressed into a thin line, and I subconsciously noticed the way his lip ring stood out in the darkness of his room. His jaw was clenched, and I could see the jutting veins that pulsed underneath the layer of skin on his neck.

But his eyes were what caught me the most. The way they pierced through me like a sharp double-edged blade so effortlessly like it never had before. It carried with it the hurt that had been eating up at him and was now turning to anger.

When he felt as though I wouldn't turn my head away, he hesitantly released my chin and traced a gentle path up the curve of my tear-stained cheeks with the tip of his finger. Though his gaze was hard, his touch was, as always, gentle and I found myself slipping as I unconsciously moved closer to his hand that was now resting lightly on my cheek.

"I can take it if you ignore me..." His gravelly voice started low, filled with a foreboding tone that had shivers racing up and down my spine. "I can handle it if you give me the silent treatment. But never... ever pull away from me!" He ended in a grave tone, one that awakened something deep within me, and I couldn't help but nod a little in response as if I was under a trance... His spell...

All my determination and strength to keep on ignoring him momentarily disappeared into nothingness as I continued to look deep into his dark eyes , and I found myself temporarily succumbing to my innermost selfish desires to keep him with me despite how dangerous it would be.

But can you blame me for being selfish for even just a moment in my life?

All I wanted was for someone to love who would love me back just as much. For someone to love me and not end up leaving me alone.

But when I thought I could find that love in a man named Adrian, I found myself and the people I love in even more danger than I bargained for.

I lost my aunt...

I lost my friend...

And I might lose him in the end as well.

My heart constricted at the thought and the burning desire I initially harbored of going back into his arms disappeared into thin air. I started to shake my head, wanting to deny it all. I didn't want any of this.

I didn't want anyone else to die. Not Adrian....

I didn't want to be near him anymore....

But that is a lie..... A painful Lie. A lie I couldn't bring myself to believe no matter how much I tried.