you love me?

03

washington dc , tuesday, week 4 of school @ 4:57pm - and so on

15 minutes after "the incident"

"no i'm telling you that i accidentally opened the door for her cause she knocked on it but i didn't talk to er' !!"

"so you're telling me you forgot you were half naked and opened the door, but the thing i should be congratulating you on is you not talking to her?" my other cousin rayven questioned me

when she says it like that, me not talking to her sounds like the least of my worries, and i know she saw because her eyes slightly widened, i saw it happen

"alright well- you ain't gotta say it like that negro"

"who??? girl be fuckin fr, you sound like a slave owner, stop trynna set us back 400+ years"

"anyways how am i gonna go back there when i know she saw me?"

"just sneak back in" rayven retorted while leaning back and opening a bag of fritos, the plain kind

"i don't know how you can eat that nasty shit"

"worry about your ex walking in on you and not my chip preference ma'am"

"oh fuck you, bye"

"byeee" she walked me out of her room and shut the door behind me quickly, probably to get ready to see her girlfriend right now, gianni i think her name was?

i went back up to my floor and i waited at the end of the hall until i seen kenadee come out of the room with... a teddy bear and candy in her hands? she never gave me that kind of stuff.....

girl why the fuck do you care? get into your room.

i unlocked the door, and when i got inside i locked the front door right back just so she wouldn't think that i even came back. making sure i moved absolutely nothing on my way, something fell on the floor though when i was walking in though , hopefully she won't notice that i didn't even touch the letters i received from family members congratulating me for getting into college that was next to the door.

i got into my room and threw myself onto my bed, dreading classes tomorrow because my first two are with kenadee, and how am i gonna avoid her if that's the case? she's gonna ask to walk with me and shit and i don't want that.

i soon heard the front door slamming, then my phone started to go off repeatedly at the same time i was only in my room for an hour this shit is outrageous, fuck is you slamming doors for, hulk??

i opened my phone and looked at the text, it was from rayven she said to answer her calls because she was crying and i was surprised cause this bitch never cries

i picked up her call and, i cannot make this shit up this bitch was crying like she was that one guy with his blunt

i tried asking what's wrong with her but everything she said was muffled by the tears streaming down her face

"okay okay relax, like take a deep breath and tell me what happened to you"

"she cheated on meeeeeahhhh!!" she screeched through my phone luckily i had airpods in, but i honestly feel like you could hear her through them and i couldn't help but laugh..

"with who rayven??"

"YO FUCK ASS EX, and i hope she hear me too even though i don't know if she's even there.." my jaw? on the floor in all honestly maybe that's why she came in slamming doors and shit.

then rayven started crying, and since i don't know how to comfort people when they cry i just hung up on her instead, seems mean but i really didn't know what else to do and usually when this happens she needs to be alone.

i put my phone on silent, turned my lights off and took a nap, then no longer than an hour later again i hear knocking at my door, and with me forgetting that i was rooming with my ex, i cussed at her telling her to shut the fuck up and stop knocking on my door.

"well that's no way to talk to someone trying to get you food"

"who said i wanted food from a broke bitch like you???"

"oh?? alright xemena damn, now when yo fat ass smell it don't say shit" she yelled at me while walking out

fat? bitch who's fat im just chubby, the hell? i mean.. shit, i have food in here but if she come back with chipotle then i don't know what ima do to be honest

i got tired of seeing ppl with ios 16, and bragging about it when it's just the beta, but i also wanted it so i'm not gon clown it too much.

i went on the apple website to download it, then when it was fully downloaded after taking an entire hour just to do so i installed it, which only took a few minutes don't understand how that works but alright.

i heard kenadee come back into the room and the only thing i smelled was chipotle, i stuck my head out of my doorframe and looked at her making sure my door creaked so she'd hear me.

she sighed lowly, and turned around

"yes xemena?"

"whatcha got there?"

"nunya, now gone" she turned away from me again to put her key in her door and go into her room, then i stood behind her

"i know you brought a bowl for me, so give it up." i didn't actually know that i just hoped she did because if not that'd be embarrassing.

she chuckled lowly and rummaged through the bag pulling out a fork and a bowl marked "C1" (C stands for chicken) meaning she made my bowl first..

that's sweet....

i snatched it away from her and walked back into my room shutting the door behind me, i slightly felt my heart skip a beat, has she always been that caring?? girl no, she literally cheated on you shut up.

once i sat on my bed i opened my laptop and started on my "About Me" essay that i know i was gonna have to make for every teacher with a "Why did you choose this subject?" at the end of every essay, that's the only part i'd have to edit fully

i ate my chipotle after doing all of the essays, and turned on one of berlin's (berleezy) game series i haven't watched which was sleeping dogs

A/N: i have watched it, it's great 🤭

but i suddenly had the urge to flick my bean and in which i did two times i'm usually quiet during doing that but today my lungs had enough air to shout to their hearts' desire and i'm sure kenadee heard me if she wasn't listening, but it was even more embarrassing the second time because at the end of all of that i screamed her name, and i'm really hoping she didn't hear a damn thing or i'll never hear the end of it from her.
____________________________________

so uhhh yeah that's it 😍

started: march 9th, 2022
finished: september 15th, 2022

ion even know how many months it's been big dawg.. my fault 🫤

see you in another year!!