Just Crash, Fall Down (You Me At Six fanfic)

Chapter 7 - Misery Business (Part 2)

I knew I would have to tell them....

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"You really wanna know Josh?! You really wanna know what keeps me awake nearly every night? Do you really wanna know what hurts me the most? Do you really need to know why I feel the need to do this? Why I feel the need to do this every second of every day?" I started off shouting but unded up at bearly a whisper.

They all looked gobsmacked at my outburst but I carried on.

"I do it because I have to. I do it to remind myself that I'm a real, breathing human being. I do it to remind myself that the world is a cold, cruel, heartless reality. I do it to remind myself of the harsh world we live in. The harsh world that won't give one simple London girl a break. The world that won't give up anything without something being wanted in return." I couldn't stop, it all just kept spilling out. I wanted to stop. I didn't want to see the looks of pity that would be splashed across their faces when I'd finished. I hate sympathy, almost as much as I hate the police, and that's saying something. They all just sat there, listening to me go on about how life isn't fair. " The world that won't give up on his pliet to make my life a living hell..."

This was it.

They'd want to know now...

Eventually after a few awkward moments of silence it was Dan who uttered the five words that made my heart stop.

"Charlotte, what happened to you?"

And that's when the tears overflowed and fell onto the carpet at my feet.

Now or never. Right?

(A/N: Apologize in advance for this)

I turned round to see if Chris was still sitting on the floor and found him standing up behind me, motioning for me to go with him. He took my hand and lead me to the armchair, he sat down and made me sit on his lap. I instinctively cuddled up to him as he stroked my hair.

"I-I...w-when I was 8...my Mum was killed in a car crash with the police." Here come the water works. Chris held me to him and continued to stroke my hair to try and calm me down. The other boys gasped at my statement, but I carried on.

"She wasn't a criminal or anything, just in the wrong place at the wrong time...she was workong late and me and my step-dad went to go and pick her up. But when we got to the corner by the bar she worked at we found t to be crawling with police officer's. One of them drove us home and told us that everything was alright." I scoffed. "But of course, it wasn't. She had been turning a corner when the police car hit her. It was going at 120mph without lights or sirens on and Mummy forgot to look left a second time...." By this time I had tears streaming down my face and I was soaking Chris's shirt. He didn't seem to mind...

"And that's why you do it?" I gasped at the first words spoken by Chris in the last 20 minutes. Oh he only knew that half of it.

"Erm..."

"There's more!?" Shouted Max. I looked over at him to see that he was also crying. What for?

"Max, there's one thing you need to know about me. There is always fucking more." I said with venom as I thought about the next part of my story. Max looked shocked but he held his tounge and just nodded at me.

I need to stop calling my life a story. Not like someone can just close the book and it'll end.

"After she...um..yeah, my step-dad, Lewis, took me to America with some of his family to cheer me up..." I stopped and looked into Chris's eyes. I think he sensed what was coming next....

"But he neglected to mention that his little journey would include trying to...um...yeah.." I looked down ashamed of what was coming out of mouth. I hate this part of the story. It makes me feel dirty and tainted.

"Char...please tell me he didn't..." Insinuated Josh. I knew whathe meant but I shook my head at him. "Oh thank go-"

"He tried to...." They gasped. Max, Dan and especially Chris looked physically sick. Josh was opening and closing his mouth like a guppy, trying to make sense of it all and Matt was just blank. "And a month after that my Grandad died. So that, Josh, is why I do it. Because people will either leave me or hurt me, and I can't help but think it's my fault."

I closed my eyes against the tears but they still managed to escape, oozing down my face and wetting Chris's t-shirt.

'You're just a pathetic little emo Charlotte! You know he'll find you now right?! Pathetic!'

And Belle's thoughts were the last thing I knew before I slipped off into what I hoped would be a dreamless sleep....

Chris pov

"Chris, mate, I'm so sorry. I should've known you would never do anything..." Josh finally whispered after what seemed like an age of silence.

"Yeah, you should've! Definitely not after Kate!" I whisper shouted, vaguely aware that Charlotte was sleeping on my lap. He face nestled on my shoulder, I could feel he steady breathing against my neck, making me feel warm and at ease.

"Well...I-I.."

"You what Josh? You know I still blame myself for Kate and I would never, EVER, let that happen to somone else." I said rather loudly, making Charlotte stir in her sleep. I shushed her and kissed her forehead before turning back to the guys. "You were the one that made her tell us Josh, you..." I didn't know what to do, say or think, I was a mess. "Josh...and the rest of you can...can you go for a bit please? I'll text you if she wants to talk when she wakes up. But just leave...please." I said with a strained tone. I needed to clean up this place, it was covered in blood...

Her blood...

Just like Kate's...

No! Chris stop!!

I watched them all get up, following what I said and walk out of the door.

"Max!" I whisper shouted, well aware now that Charlotte was still asleep on me. He popped his head back round the door and I noticed that his face was tear stained. He'd cried to?

"Yeah mate?" I swallowed.

"Can you stay...please? And help me tidy up and stuff. You seem to care about her as much as I-anyway help me?" He was nodding and giving me a sympathetic smile before I even finished my sentence.

"Of course mate. I think she might need some protecting in this world...that duty falls to you and me now." I'll give her anything-everything that she needs. "I mean where can I girl go wrong with a best friend..." He pointed to himself. "And a boyfriend." He pointed to me.

Me?

"Max, n-"

"Chris, shut up. I see the way you look at her and it's only been a day. You like her..." Oh if he only knew... "Now where is the cleaning stuff and I'll get to work." He said with a smile.

"Hold on let me get it..." He laughed.

"You're to busy with your new job as a pillow." He pointed to Charlotte. "I'll do it. Be right back."

With that he walked out of the bedroom in the search of cleaning supplies.

I looked at Charlotte curled up in my lap.

"He's right. You need protecting. And God knows I'll protect you 'till you tell me to stop. Even then I probably won't stop. I'll be there. I promise."

I kissed her on the head again, let my head fall and slowly fell asleep.....

Unknown pov

Why did he ask Max to stay and not me?!

I loved her more than they both ever could!

I've loved her ever since I set eyes on her 14 years ago, and he thinks he can just come here and disrupt my plans for this girl!

Oh no he wouldn't get away with it!

She's mine!

And only mine!

I will get her....

Even if I have to crush Chris's stupid little heart to get to her....