The Dick & Don Show: S1

EPISODE 04: Evening in the Archives

Don and Dick get a job at the local museum, and the exhibits come to life
Dashlie breaks into the museum to steal art with style
Don gets sick and Dick works alone, having a panic attack the entire night. The exhibits come to life, but when the night is over, it is unclear if what happened actually happened or not
-The museum is a museum of art and adventure. It has all sorts of art depicting great events that happened in that artists' life and exhibits of adventurers exploring unknown territory and creating places we know today, such as this town and New York and Ohio and so on...
-Dashlie finds a painting of a phat dopy cat and must have it
-the museum supervisor is an elf named Reginald Rowell

Dashlie brought Don to the museum because she noticed him going into one of his depressive episodes and wanted to keep him out of the house. Don doesn't know this, he just thinks Dashlie dragged him to the museum with her to look at all the exhibits while Dick was away, trying to get a job (an actual sentence I could use: She called me a "f-ck nugget" and demanded I open up [the door]")

Don is hanging out with Dashlie at the local museum. While she is admiring some art, he moves to another section and looking at all the accomplishments the people presented had, and he wonders if they ever felt any doubt in their abilities or had any true direction in life, wondering what was left undocumented in their life that they cared deeply about but historians didn't.
He's staring at a picture of a mustachioed man and wonders what he would think of all his greatest life events being stored away in a museum. He senses someone walk up to him and looks to see that exact mustachioed man with gray hair. Don is a bit startled by this but talks with him a bit, asking what he thought of his discoveries being put in a museum (delectably exhilarating! nice to know someone will remember me at my greatest), if he ever doubted himself (all the time, just have to keep on hitchin' and hiking and see where the road takes you), Don asks what if there is no road, he says then you have to pave one yourself, Even when you don't know where you're going? Even if that road may leave you off a cliff, the man says suicide is never the answer which freaks Don out and he says that's not what he meant, but the man cuts him off and says Don reminds him of himself when he was younger. The man then says it's ok to feel you have no direction in life. Exploration isn't always one straight road, keep going through the trees and rivers and pave your road through there (and destroy the wildlife?). The man ignores Don's question and fixes his belt, saying he's off on another adventure: going on a trip to the ice cream parlor with his granddaughter.
Don watches him go and looks back to see there is a wax statue of that man, which is so detailed it freaks Don out a bit. He walks away but immediately bumps into Dashlie, who exclaims about a painting she saw that he must see, and she drags him to the painting of the cat. Don isn't sure what it is about the cat, but he absolutely vibes with it. Dashlie says she must have it, but Don reminds her that nothing is for sale in a museum. Dashlie smiles and turns to him and says "you're right, it's all for free" before taking out her phone, saying she must construct a plan, and running off.
Don is left standing there in the museum. He stares at the cat and dissociates, the world dissolving around him. Eventually someone yelling fades into his senses and snaps him out of it. The person asks where the art exhibit is and he says they are in it. They keep asking it over and over until it weirds Don out and frustrates him to where he just speed-walks away, the person yelling after him. He eventually bumps into someone and looks up to see Richard, who gives him an angry look. Don is surprised to see him and asks what he's doing here. Dick states the obvious saying he's trying to get a job here. Nighttime security guard is what he's applying for since it requires little training. Dick then wonders what don was running from and Don shakes his head, just saying someone weird. Dick then says it's not healthy to run from yourself, and Don laughs, telling him to shut up
The supervisor then let's Dick in and then asks if don (supervisor addresses him as "partner" and Don doesn't realize it's romantic) is joining him. Dick looks back at him and don shrugs saying why not, and they walk in
Somehow they get the job and we time skip to a few days into their job. Don and Dick are walking in as their night shift starts, and they encounter their supervisor, Reginald Rowell, who is an elf and has dark, emerald spots on his skin. It's only contagious to those of elven decent (aka Don). He is just now leaving because he's been given the day off after telling Don and Dick what to do (he addresses Dick and calls don his boyfriend. Both freeze up and don hastily explains that's not what they are as dick laughs loudly. Rowell apologizes, as last time he saw them he thought they were flirting and didn't know). He then leaves and sneezes as he passes by Don, making Don jump and Dick laugh at him. Don expresses his concern and dick ruffles his hair, aggravating don as dick says he just sneezed, it'll be fine. They then walk into work
Time skip to a week in now. Dick walks into the empty building, a bit unsettled. He notices Don didn't come into work (Dashlie had been driving him in the past week). He texts Don, who apologizes like he is having a stroke and says he is sick. Dick recalls the encounter with the supervisor a day or so ago and infers Don caught the emerald flu. Dick is not happy about this and insults Don, saying he's an idiot for getting sick. Don responds with saying he's right, the supervior should not have been sick and gotten Don sick, it's entirely Don's fault. This sentence is followed up by a keyboard smash, and Don later sends a string of texts saying he dropped his phone, each sentence mispelled. He gets tired of trying to correct himself and just says "sleep" before he stops responding to texts
Dick is alone on a graveyard shift. His mind wanders to everything scary that happens at night, from his own experiences and stories he's heard. Even though he's worked the graveyard shift before, he'd never done it without Don or someone in office. Apparently almost the entire staff is elven and didn't want to get exposed to the emerald flu, so any other species was put on replacement. No one was here to fill Don's shift, unfortunately

Dick tries to get settled in the office and cope with being alone in the silence and darkness, cut to Dashlie on the back side of the building. She climbs up onto the roof and kills a security camera, laying out the blueprint and seeing where she will follow the vents to avoid the cameras and get the great painting. She slips on gloves and takes a picture the blueprint before skipping the phone into her pocket and heading over to the ventilation. She looks down it, freaking out a bit but determined. She slips down, scaling quietly and carefully until her foot slips and she falls, biting her tongue as to not scream. She manages to slow her descent by putting her hands out on either side of the walls and finally reaching contact with a vent. It's big enough for her, thankfully, and she pulls out the blueprint to double check when the next open area would be. She ties her hair up and crouches down, mumbling how art theft is a chore or something

Dick is chilling, watching videos on his phone and not looking at the cameras. He starts hearing noises not from his phone and he eventually turns the phone off. Dick hears noises outside of his security room, but on the cameras nothing is there. He knows he has to go out there, but there's no one to watch the camera as he inspects. Eventually he thinks it's ok and heads out with a gun, knowing fully well he's more likely to accidentally shoot himself than an intruder. When he goes out, he sees nothing and then realizes someone is calling to him, not saying his name but instead being like "hey! You! Boy! Look at me when Im talking to you!" Dick turns around and sees a portrait of a dog in a tuxedo talking to him. Dick freezes up and the dog is like "what? You live in a world of magic and folly and a painting of a dapper dog talking is what gets you?" Dick is astonished and stumbles back as a pair of statues are all turned to one another and speaking animatedly, and a group of small solider figures yell at him to watch where he's stepping
Dick slinks back into the security room and he looks back at the cameras. he's alone in the museum. Nothing is there but behind him he sees so much going on. He's genuinely wondering now if he's hallucinating or not
He steps out and takes out his phone to take a picture to see if this would show up, but as he does so, a winged monkey swoops down and takes his phone and runs off. He gives chase

Back to Dashlie. She freezes as her phone falls out her pocket and clatters to the vent floor. She stays there for a bit before silence rings throughout the vents. She puts it back in and crawls through the vent still. Eventually she reaches a vent grate and peers through, but she can't see so she leans in closer. The vent then pops open and she falls to the tiled floor, but before she busts her head open on the ground, something catches her jacket and slowly lowers her to the ground. It's a giant skeleton of a dragon. She pats it's nose and thanks it before walking off. As she exits the room, she realizes what just happened and that that wasn't normal. She turns around and it's still there. She shakes her head and just continues on after telling it that she wasn't here

Dick loses the monkey and gets frustrated, looking around. He finds the wax statue of the man Don ran into that first day. He calms down, realizing there's a person here, then freaks out because there's a person here. He asks what the hell the man is doing here, and the man says nothing but exploration. He says how Dick reminds him of himself when he was younger, and as he talks Dick looks closer at the man, realizing it was almost like his clothes were cemented to his skin, and as the man is in the middle of speaking, he blurts "holy sh!t, you're not real" The man stares at him blankly, freaking Dick out a bit more, and then he steps towards Dick almost menacingly and this frightens Dick and makes him run away

Dashlie has a mission impossible moment where she skirts along walls, takes down cameras, and clumsily summersaults across the floor.

Still on the hunt for his phone

He encounters the weird person don talked about, asking where the art exhibit is. They keep asking and walking closer while dick tries telling them to leave.

Dick encounters the wax statue again and the weird person saves him. He finally sees who it is. It's Davis

A/N: Yeah this is the episode I never finished that ruined everything for all of us