Daisies

My little sister

ㄨNickㄨ

***

"GODDAMIT MICHAEL" The woman says. The sound of a slap echoes through the empty hallways walls. 

"DON'T YOU DARE SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT" A stern male voice is heard from these thin walls. I'm leaning on the wall with my arms crossed next to the entrance to the living room, listening to the arguement happen. A moment of silence until, 

"I'm leaving, keep the kids. Nick can take care of Nat if you're that careless" Said the woman. A couple bottles clink to eachother as she leaves the house. A sigh from the males voice. I turn so that he sees my face. Full of hatered. Once the older male notices I'm there his eyes widen.

"why, Nick! You're supposed to be in bed" He says, looks like he's going to break in tears. 

"No one can sleep when you hear bottles shattering and yelling" I take my eyes off him and look at the ground. 

"is Natalie okay?" He quietly asks. I nod. 

"why did that have to happen, dad?" I ask and look at him. "Why can't we keep smiles on our faces without pretending?" 

He sighs and walks to me. He looks at me deep in the eyes.

"I don't know son, you should go to bed it's 3 am" He puts a hand on my shoulder. 

"Okay.." I whisper. I turn around and head to my room. I break in tears when I wrap the blankets around me. I cry and cry and cry. Until I can't anymore. I cry until I've drifted off to sleep. Why should I have to deal with that? I'm only 12. Why should Nat have to deal with that at the age of 8? 

She shouldn't. I promise I'll do something about this. For me and Penelope. 

--

I'm in my bed, a bottle in my hand, a lit cigarette between my lips, tears running down my face. I'm sobbing my eyes out. About what you may ask? Everything.

I'm messed up, like look what I'm doing right now. I may or may not have just realized I can't have Duck, my parents are dead and my younger sister doesn't love me anymore. I think about it for a while. I look at the time, 8:37 pm. Maybe I could visit her?..

No. She's lived without you for a year already. She's over you. She hates you. You'll just make things worse for her. 

I tell that to myself. But there's still a piece of hope in me that maybe, just maybe, she would be happy to see me again. Just.. what if? I sigh and take another puff of the cigarette. I put it out and get to the bathroom. I throw out the bottle and take a hard look at the mirror. So that's why she left. I splash water on my face and look at the mirror again. Whatever. I go back to my room and put some clothes on and look at myself once more. I decided on baggy black jeans, a navy blue sweater, and converse. Don't I look presentable? Jesus fucking christ-

I leave the house and go to my car. Somehow I still remember where it is. It's kind of far, too far for my liking. I park right in front of the house. A rising anxiety almost takes over.

"No, Nick, you're gonna get in that house and see if she still wants you as a brother.." I pause. "lets see if she still loves you" I say as I get out of my car. I look at the house again. Do I really wanna do this? Yes. Yes I do. So I get to the front door and ring the door bell, hoping for an answer. Not too long, the door opens.

"Hello, may I help you?" The woman standing at the door asks with a smile. Although she does look a bit skeptical of my appearance, which I don't blame her for. I flash her a nervous laugh and a wave.

"is Natalie here?" I ask hesitantly. Her smile dissapears and she looks at me up and down. 

"Nat, sweetheart, come here please!" She calls. "Would you like to come in?" She steps out of the way for me. I nod and enter the house. It's very cozy, the living room chairs made of leather, the lights dimmed slightly, bookshelves pressed against the walls. I love it.

"Make yourself comfortable, would you like a cup of water?" She addresses me. 

"No thank you ma'am" I smile at her and sit down on the couch. Soon enough a girl comes running down the stairs. I recognize her imidiately. Anxiety only growing as she approaches and enters the room. She's so big...

"Natalie?.." I ask. Tears fill my eyes as we stare at eachother. I don't want to move yet I want to hold her close and never let go of her again. I'm afraid she will run away from me again. 

"Nick.." She lets out. She stares at me. Not to mention she looks dissapointed, like she doesn't want to see me again.

"I'm so sorry Nat, I'm a horrible brother and I should've done something about this and I should have never let you go I am so sorry" I let my tears out. I cover my eyes in embarrassment. Soon I feel arms wrapped around me. 

"I've missed you so much brother"

"I've missed you too" I hug Nat back and keep crying. Once I stop I look at her face, whom was also crying. 

"You've grown so much" I smile. She pulls in for another hug.

"Why did you go?" She asked and pulled away from me. 

"I..." I hesitated, "I don't remember" I put a hand on my head. 

"have you been smoking?.." She asks. Fuck,

"yeah" 

"and drinking?" 

what the hell is it that obvious for a 13 year old to detect if someone has been smoking or drinking?

"you smell like it, that's why I'm asking" she says. I sigh and nod. Greaatttt.

--

"Nick I'm so proud of you!" Time exclaims.

"There's really nothing to be proud of" I laugh. 

"of course there is! You finally had the guts to get your sister back in your house!" She says. I smile at that. She's moving in with me. After a year, finally. :)