Loki oneshots

Not Who I Thought He Was (Loki & Clint)

Clint crosses his arms, jutting out his jaw as he looks down at the god. Loki looks back at him, but every few seconds, he has to look away, to recover his composure. Finally, after a few moments of silence, Clint asks, "What are you waiting for?"

Loki furrows his brows. "I beg your pardon?"

"You're soaked; you must've been out here for hours," Clint says. "What are you waiting for?"

Loki shakes his head helplessly. "For the rain to end, I suppose." He's not sure he expects that to happen any time soon, though. It's been day after day of gloomy weather, each day colder and wetter than the last. It's absolutely miserable, but he's grown accustomed to it by now.

"Why?" Clint asks. "When the rain ends, what happens then?"

Loki gives a small shrug. "I become less cold?" Is that a reasonable answer? He's not really expecting anything to happen. He just wants the rain to end.

Clint raises an eyebrow skeptically. Loki does the same, though his is more a show of confusion. What does he want?

"What are you doing here, Loki?" Clint asks.

"Absolutely nothing," Loki says. "I've done nothing for months, and I'll continue to do nothing for years to come."

Clint scoffs. "Yeah, right," he says. "What, were you looking for me? My family? What do you want?"

Loki cocks his head to the side. "Your family?" he repeats. That's a weird question. Of course he's not looking for them. Why would he...? He furrows his brows. "Where am I?"

"What do you mean, 'where are you?'"

"Missouri?" Loki guesses. "Is that what worries you? Am I near your family? Because I can leave—"

"You're not going anywhere," Clint says. He pulls his phone out of his back pocket. It flies right into Loki's hand.

"Who are you calling?" Loki asks.

"Give it back."

"Who are you calling?" Loki repeats. "Not one of the Avengers, I hope. That won't work out well for either of us."

"Give me my phone back."

"Why?" Loki asks. "So that you can tell your friends that you've found me? That I've risen from the grave yet again?"

"Yeah, that's exactly what I'm gonna do," Clint says. "I'm not just—"

Loki squeezes the phone in his hand, and its fractured pieces fall to the ground.

Clint scoffs. "Hey!"

"Ordinarily, I would not mind a small group of humans knowing of my presence," Loki says. "I do not fear that you'll ruin my plans because I have no plans. But with my brother frequenting the Earth, I have to be more cautious, so, again, I give you two options: you can either leave me be, we can go our separate ways, and agree to pretend this never happened, or I can kill you — and I would greatly prefer the first option."

"And you're just, what, gonna take my word for it if I say I'm not going to tell anyone?" Clint asks skeptically.

"Yes," Loki says, "I am, because otherwise I'd have to kill you regardless, and I don't want to do that."

Clint scoffs. "Oh, yeah, now you're worried about killing people. Didn't matter when you brainwashed me into helping you do it, but now that it's just you, now you care."

Loki sighs. That's a fair point. He can't deny it; he can't skirt around it. So he does the next best thing. "I'm sorry," he says quietly. "I would give anything to take back all the pain and the terror I brought you and your people. With the benefit of hindsight, I realize there were numerous paths I could have taken that I'd never thought of; ways to minimize the damage."