Hiding the Green Carnation's Heirs | ✔︎

EPILOGUE

"BAKLA! Bakla! Lurusus bakla!"

Hindi ko na pinansin ang kaklase kong si Budong na muling nang-iinis dahil wala na ang aming teacher at kakalabas lang. Napangisi ko. Pangit na nga ng mukha niya ang bantot pa ng pangalan.

Kinuha ko na ang bag ko bago iyon isinukbit sa aking likod at naglakad papalabas ng classroom namin. Kakatapos lang kasi ng klase at uwian na.

Kailangan ko na ring maagang umalis dahil papasok pa ako sa carenderia at pagkatapos ay uuwi na ako sa amin. Baka kasi malungkot na naman si Mommy. I'm concerned about her health. She's been staring outside the window and she seems out of her mind when I left her to go to school. Nag-iwan na rin ako ng pagkain niya sa mesa kanina, sana lang ay kinain niya iyon.

It's been three years since we arrived here in the Philippines. It was hard when we first arrived 'cause I couldn't understand their language. I was born and raised in Italy and the languages that I know of are Italian and English. Namimi-miss ko na rin si Latticus at Lorcan. When I asked Mommy why we left them, she said that they are sick so she left them with Papà.

Noong napadpad kami rito, tanging si Mommy lang ang nakikipag-usap at dahil hindi ko nga maintindihan ang pinagsasabi nila, nanatili akong tahimik. Although if Mommy would see the confusion on my face, she would translate everything they have talked about into English. After three months of living here in the Philippines, my mother taught me how to speak Tagalog so that I can understand if a local would talk to me.

At first, it was pretty hard because there were a lot of words and I sometimes messed them up, but after months of teaching me, I somehow mastered it.

Sa isang liblib na lugar kami pumunta ni Mommy. Malayo iyon sa sibilisasyon at talagang hindi ako sanay noong una pero habang nagtatagal kami sa lugar, natutunan ko na iyong mahalin. It was peaceful and I also love how fresh the air in that province. There's no too much pollution and I can see a lot of greens. Lahat rin ng tao ay mababait. While growing up in that particular village, I was happy.

Even though I was always surrounded by females and I don't have any male role models to look up to, I was contented and I was filled with love by my mother, the aunties, and grandmothers in the village. They would always spoil me with things and shower me with love and since I was surrounded with only women, I came to acquire their body language, their perspectives, their expressions, and more. Everything was perfect. I was able to express myself freely with them and act carelessly.

Not until I turned seven. My mom decided to leave that small village we used to stay in for two years and move in to another place because of unknown reason. Simula noong lumipat kami sa siyudad, nagbago na si Mommy. Parang nawala na siya sa kaniyang sarili at kahit na anong oras ay bigla na lang bibigay. Minsan matino siya pero kadalasan ay nakatulala lang siya. Nawalan ng trabaho si Mommy at nawalan kami ng mapagkukunan ng pera.

Dahil doon may mga araw na hindi kami nakakakain ng tatlong beses sa isang araw. Mayroon nga 'yong tatlong araw na halos tubig na lang ang iniinom ko dahil wala kaming pagkain na pwedeng ihain sa mesa. Sa ikaapat na araw, hindi ko na nakayanan ang gutom kaya naman umutang na ako sa carenderia malapit sa amin at buti na lang talaga ay mabait si Aling Salome at binigyan ako ng libreng pagkain. Nakita niya kasi na sobrang payat ko na.

Sa sumunod na araw at buwan, walang pagbabago kay Mommy kaya napilitan akong pumasok sa isang construction site. Noong una, ayaw pa nila sa'kin dahil nga masyado pa akong bata at baka raw may mag-report sa kanila pero dahil kailangan namin ng pera pambili ng pagkain, wala akong nagawa kundi ang lumuhod sa harap nila at magmakaawa.

In God's grace, they pitied me and accepted me in the site and I helped them with the light works like for example running errands for them, buying their meryendas, giving them water, handing them tools, and such but one time, they decided to have few drinks in the site while waiting for our salaries and I was the one who bought them their bottle of alcohols.