Come back to me - Tmr x Tw - Newtmas

Dear Newt...

Newt's pov.:

Darkness is the only thing I remember, my head feels dizzy and it hurts, I can barely open my eyes to see the sunshine coming through the tent.

Wait- a tent? Wasn't I on the Berg?

Everything suddenly comes back, I was a crank, I got the cure, I killed Tommy.
I just killed the love of my life.

I sit on the bed I'm on, if we can call it a bed, 'cause it's really only a bunch of straw covered in sheets and pillows.
"Newt!" I look up and see Minho at the entrance of the tent.
"Where are we?" I ask, still unsure
"We're in the safe heaven, you've been unconscious for almost a week" He gives me a sad smile.

That's it, I have to tell everyone that I killed Tommy, they'll hate me, that's what I deserve, It's all my fault.
I'm so lost in my thoughts that if it weren't for Minho I wouldn't even notice that I'm crying.

"I killed him..." I whisper but it's loud enough so that he can hear.
"What..? Newt what are you taking about?" I can't bring myself to look at him and I let out a sob.

"I stabbed him with a knife and he told me to go or we would both die I...I'm sorry I swear I didn't mean to" I say without even breathing.
"You can hate me if you want..." I continue sobbing until I can't even keep my eyes open.

I feel Minho hugging me tight and I continue crying in his chest.
"Now you listen to me ok shank? It wasn't your fault ok? Thomas wouldn't have wanted you to blame yourself, he died for the person he loved" His voice breaks a little when he says that he died.

"I already miss him..." I whimper.
"All of us do, it's been a tough week...I'm going to call the others ok?" I just nod but before going away he gives me a piece of paper.

"He wrote one for all of us" I open the piece of paper and my heart falls a little.

Dear Newt,

This is the first letter that I can remember writing. Obviously I don't know if I wrote any before the maze,
But even if it's not the first, it's most likely to be one of my lasts.

I want you to know that I'm not scared, well, not of dying anyway, it's more forgetting, forgetting everything we've been through togheter that's what scares me.

So every night I've been saying their names out loud: Alby, Winston, Ben, Chuck and I just repeat them over and over like a prayer, and it all comes flooding back.

Just the little things like where the sun used to hit the Glade at that perfect moment right before it slipped beneath the walls, the taste of Frypan's stew, I never thought I'd miss that stuff so much; and I remember you.

From the first time I met you in the Glade, the tough second in command, but from that moment we escaped the Maze, I knew I would follow you anywhere, and I have.

If I could do it all over again, I would. And I wouldn't change a thing, well, maybe something. My hope for you: when you're looking back years from now, you'll be able to say the same.

The future is in your hands now, Newtie. I know you'll find a way to do what's right. You always have. Take care of everyone for me. And take care of yourself.

You deserve to be happy.
Thank you for being my friend. Goodbye, I love you Newt.

-Forever yours, Tommy

I fold the letter and put it into my pocket.

My Tommy is dead and he's not coming back.