If I'm wrong, I am right / Severus Snape x reader

only you

TW: SA

A week passed and he seemed to be okay, not happy and still very hurt but well enough to stop drinking - at least during class.

Now it was a friday afternoon and you decided to visit him. The last time you were at his chambers you two kissed -again. And he interrupted it - again.

He makes things so hard sometimes but he wasn't to blame. Severus lost his wife and was emotionally unstable, of course he couldn't kiss you or like you the way his wife prophesied it. But all that mattered in the moment he was so close to you was his warm body, pressing against yours. The unfamiliar comfort and need to feel him - to have him as close as possible. And then he stopped it, and it felt like dying for a second, only for a second but that was already too much.

,,How are you?" you asked him, after sitting down on the couch in front of the warm fire.

,,Better than yesterday." he answered very short, obviously not wanting to talk more about that.

,,Do you still have any whiskey here?"

He looked shocked - exposed, which wasn't your intention. Of course he still drank because how could an addict stop from one second to another? The intention was not to put it away but for you to have something to drink and you told him that.

After a minute of thinking he stood up, went to his big bookshelf and opened a box which stood inside of it, to give you his last, half full bottle - and a glas of course.

You drank a full glas before you began to talk.

,,All these time we almost kissed, you rejected. You alway said it's because you think you're bad for me and that I deserve more or better. These are only excuses. And bad ones to but before you say something I want you to listen, alright?"

,, Alright." he said, sitting down next to you, like all these times before when you two kissed and held each other close.

,,I'm going to tell you something about my past, which shows how much you did for me , how much you mean to me without even knowing it." you drank half a glass of whiskey and took a deep breath before you began.

,,When I was younger, I don't know maybe seven or eight years old, my dad had always some friends coming around. I liked them very much because they always said I'm their little princess and told me how pretty I am and stuff like that.
One day my dad got a call from the hospital and he had to get there because there was an emergency and he was the only doctor who was free, so he called one of his friends to keep an eye over me.
His friend came over and everything was fine until we started to watch TV. He took me on his lap, which he did many times before but this time it was different.
He began to touch me on areas nobody did before."
you stopped to hold the upcoming tears from falling down your cheek , which did not work.

From his face you could tell how shocked
he was and how much he suffered hearing you telling him this. All he wanted is to protect you all the time - even from himself but he miserably failed. It was impossible to safe you from this cruel world because it already hurt you.

He opened up his arms to hug you, waiting for a sign that it was okay for you.

,,I don't know what to say y/n. I am so, so sorry for you. If I ever find this man I am going to rip this throat out of his neck.," he said which so much anger in his voice ,you never heard before. You sobbed into his chest before you spoke again - quietly, almost unbearable but loud enough for him to understand every word.

,,That's not even all of it..." you began ,,he did so many things to me but I didn't know what it was, how to name it and that's because I told my dad none of it. But I think he noticed something weird happened and his friend never came again.
After that happened I couldn't hug my dad or any male person anymore nor could I be in the same room alone with them. Never. At night I dreamed about this over and over again.
,,You're a gorgeous little princess" he used to say when he touched my breasts, while he satisfied himself.
It broke me but I had to pull myself together and for all these years I thought it would be impossible for me to be in the same room alone with a man - then I met you Severus.
From the first time I saw you, even tho you weren't really nice to me I noticed that there's something special with you- and as you can see I was right.
What I'm trying to say is that you are the person I feel safe around - the person I feel loved around and you don't want to accept this."

You were now facing him, still crying with a hand on his cheek.

,,Y/n" he began.

,,Don't say one more word of you try to reject me again. Please, just don't."

,,Y/n, my dear." he said again , and this time you let him talk.

,,I was so unsure about my feelings towards you and it hurt me everytime I stopped the kisses, because that's everything I wanted. Then it came to my mind again what kind of man I am and what kind of women you are - a divine, beautiful and brilliant woman who deserves the world and more."

,,Then kiss me Severus. Show me how much I mean to you." you said , almost begging him for it.

His reached out his hand for you face, to touch it gently, before his face came closer to yours - finally kissing you. His harsh lips exploring your soft, tasting you and pulling you even closer if that was still possible.

You were both so desperate for each others touch that it quickly went from a gentle, soft kiss to passionate and hungry kiss to getting to know each other better in a different way. To know how the other person reacts to the touch and movements.

( No proofread and written at 12 p.m, so it has probably a few mistakes)