The Aberrations of S.I.D.E.

No. 44: Not That Awkward

Virgil cleared his throat. "So, uh, Logan, how was your—"

"Don't talk to me," Logan said thickly, crunching on a piece of toast with more aggression than Virgil thought was possible.

Patton winced slightly. "Yeah, last night's Amphibia watch was... hectic."

"Marcy was his favorite?" Janus concluded.

"Yep."

"A fun and nonsensical kid's show, Patton," Logan grumbled. "That was what you promised me. A FUN AND NONSENSICAL KID'S SHOW."

"You heard 'talking frogs' and assumed," Patton told him, pointing at him. "It is not my fault that you got attached to the character who goes through the most out of anyone. It's not my fault that I did, it's not my fault that everyone who's seen the show has—I think you can swallow your angst for the time being."

"Absolutely the fuck not."

Patton sighed. "In case you couldn't tell, we stopped at True Colors. I didn't have the heart to let him continue in that state."

"All right, I'll be sure to avoid Logan in the future." Janus turned to Roman and Virgil. "So, how was your Valentine's Day, boys?"

Roman flushed, ducking his head. "We—um—well—"

"We did it," Virgil said matter-of-factly, taking a bite of eggs. "Officially."

There was silence for a couple seconds.

"Oh, congrats," Patton told them before going back to his pancakes.

Logan frowned slightly. "You... you do know what they mean, don't you?"

Patton let out a little laugh. "Lo-Lo, I'm seventeen, and I have gone through multiple classes discussing the human body to help me with my powers. I know what they're talking about."

"All right then." Logan raised an eyebrow at Janus and Remus. "You two don't seem as over the moon as I thought you'd be."

Remus shrugged. "Eh, it's not as exciting the second time."

"You assho—" Virgil started.

"THE SECOND TIME?!" Patton and Logan shouted in unison, causing a couple heads to turn.

Roman rubbed the bridge of his nose. "First time was after the whole Isabelle Incident, so we decided that it didn't count."

"Oh, okay, gotcha, I'll forget about it," Patton said, holding up a hand.

Logan gave them a look that roughly translated to you two are insane. "I... I don't think that's how it works?"

"What do you know?" Remus scoffed. "Your first major crush was ace and so is your boyfriend-slash-future-husband, you're not gonna know how it works."

Patton raised his eyebrows. "First major crush?"

"Oh my gosh, I forgot about your crush on Vanessa!" Roman said cheerfully. "If I'd remembered, I would've totally embarrassed her on her quinceanera with that little factoid instead of reminding everyone of that time she cut her own bangs!"

Logan slammed his hands on the table, cheeks flaming up. "No! No, this is Embarrassing Roman and Virgil time, not Embarrassing Me time! So shut up about Vanessa! I have been over her for half a fucking decade!"

"All of you shut up, this is still a major moment and I am legally obligated to grill Virgil on this," Janus said loudly, waving his hands around. "Assuming this was your plan?"