Without you

Chapter 23

Ofelia sat down next to Kanan. The man hadn't left Ezra's side the last four days. Just three days ago they arrived at the med center. The system was not too far from Tatooine so she had been able to keep in touch with Luke.

Ofelia made sure to keep her distance those first days. The thought of Ezra dying took her breath away. But those people, his family, hadn't seen him in years and...she had to give them space.

It was only right.

There was someone else though that had the exact same idea as her. Lonnie. To be honest at first Ofelia avoided her. Yes, she had helped save Ezra. But then she had also...

Still, hour by hour and with nothing to do but worry and wait, the two started talking. And in just four days they had gotten close. Real close.

"Do you think he'll wake up?" Lonnie asked late one night. She was gazing at the general direction of Ezra's room, eyes unfocused.

Ofelia sighed "I have to believe that he will. He has to. The Slave Master...he took away everyone I had ever loved. I can't let him take Ezra away too"

Lonnie smiled. "You'll love the crew. And I feel better knowing they're in good hands"

That caught Ofelia off guard. "You're leaving?"

Lonnie leaned back against her chair, stretching her arms. "Yeah. Don't get me wrong, I love them. They took me in when I had nowhere else to go and all that. But there's just...too many rules. And orders. I'm not made for that kind of stuff"

"Where will you go?" Ofelia leaned her chin on her backhand.

"Here and there. I'm not sure. I kind of miss it, you know? The pirate life. Just roaming the galaxy. No specific destination. Causing trouble and getting away. Leaving for the next place"

Ofelia wrapped her arms around her torso and slipped back on her seat. "I don't think I'm made for the rebel life either" she turned to the door of Ezra's room "But he is"

Lonnie followed her gaze. "So what are you going to do?"

Ofelia shook her head. "I can't ask him to go with me. Somehow, him being here feels right. This is where he was supposed to be"

They stayed silent for a moment.

"How long will you stay?"

"Until he wakes up. It feels wrong leaving them now"

Ofelia nodded.

"You?" Lonnie raised an eyebrow.

"I'll see. After he wakes up. I have to talk to him"

Lonnie didn't say anything more. The tension was too thick. And Ofelia had been glad.

And now there she was. Next to Kanan. If it were not for the fact that his condition was critical, Ezra almost looked like he was sleeping. She peeked at Kanan. His sole attention seemed to be on the boy.

"He loves you, you know? Even when he said he didn't. I know he loved you"

Kanan didn't stir. Didn't blink. Did not give any indication that he had acknowledged or even heard her. For a second Ofelia doubted he had. Until-

"I failed him. I hurt him. I pushed him away"

"I hated you" she found herself admitting. "While we were on the slave camp, when I fist met him he told me. He told me everything. Everything you said. Everything you did. And I hated you, because he was amazing and you just..."

She chocked back the tears. The warmth of Kanan's hand burned her shoulder. She gripped her chair tightly. She couldn't cry. Not here. Not now.

"I hate me too" Kanan's voice was heavy with his own share of unshed tears. Ofelia wiped her eyes.