𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘦

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( tw: eating disorders and suicide mention )

you explain to the girls that you just went to the park and tammy would not stop apologizing to you, no matter how many times you said it was okay. now here you were, sitting on the couch with rose, as keeping up the with the kardashians was playing on the tv. you were mindlessly watching the show as rose was sketching. "this show is ridiculous," rose mumbles as you laugh. she glances over at you. "(y/n), what do you think of this?" she asks, showing you a beautiful sketch of a dress. "oh, it's lovely," you respond. "do you really think so?" she asks. you nod your head a couple of times. "rose, it's a masterpiece. i would totally rock that if i saw that in a store!" rose raises an eyebrow. "how about you try," she says, handing you the tablet. "what?" you question as you take the tablet in your lap. "draw a dress or something," she responds. "like a cocktail dress?" you ask. "sure," rose replies. "i need perimeters, rose! don't let me run loose here!" you exclaim as rose chuckles. "draw a cocktail dress," she says. "for rich people?" you ask. "for any type of people." you nod as bite your tongue. you sketch a tight bodice cocktail dress, with flowy see-through sleeves. you apply a metallic light green color to the bodice and a white sheer color to the sleeves. "it's like i'm on project runway," you say. you and rose share a laugh. "and, there we go!" you say, handing the tablet back to rose. rose's eyes widen at what you had drawn. "this is actually really good, (y/n)," she says with a smile growing on her face. "i mean of course i would change the colors, and go over the stitching designs... but besides that i absolutely love it." rose leans over and squeezes your shoulder. you smile at rose. "i can use this, right?" you nod in response to her question. she lets out an excited squeal as she starts working on the tablet once more. it grows silent between the two of you, the only noises was roses' pen tapping against the screen and the tv in the background. your attention turns to the tv.

you and rose sat on the couch for about an hour, having small little discussions and laughing at the kardashians. "(y/n)!" tammy calls from the kitchen. you get up and head into the room. it smelt delicious. "are you hungry?" she asks, wiping her hands on a dish towel. you force a smile onto your face. "yeah, totally." you lie through your teeth. luckily for tammy, she was able to hide her true feelings through fake facial expressions too. "i made some macaroni and cheese," she says with a smile. "it smells really good, i'd love to have some," you smile back. tammy nods and scoops some of the noodles into a bowl, handing you a fork. you thank her and sit at the island. you take a deep breath, trying to control the thoughts swarming in your head, and place a large spoonful of noodles in your mouth. "how is it?" tammy asks, watching your every micromovement. you raise your eyebrows, raising a hand to cover your full mouth, "so good, it's really... hot," you say breathly. tammy chuckles as she stands opposite of you, leaning against the counter. your eyes drift from the bowl back to tammy who was staring at you. you quickly shove another spoonful of noodles in your mouth. "so," you say, clearing your throat, "what do you do?" tammy raises an eyebrow, knowing exactly what you were doing. you were deflecting. "i do a lot of," tammy pauses. "ur-um small things here and there." you nod, realizing that you both were equally lying to each other. you manage to finish the bowl of mac and cheese after another three minutes of silence. "thank you for lunch, tammy. it was delicious," you smile. tammy presses her lips into a smile - not a real smile, either. you walk over to the sink and begin rinsing out your dirty dish. "honey," tammy starts to say. you turn around to face her. "yeah?" tammy takes your hand in hers. "you won't get better if you don't talk about it." you stare into tammy's brown eyes. "i don't know what you're talking about." deflecting, once more. tammy takes a moment to think about her words very carefully. "thank you for lunch, i need to go shower." you say promptly, walking away, leaving tammy in the kitchen alone. she just sighs and rubs her temples.

you go into your bathroom and turn on the water of the shower. nothing beats a nice and warm shower on a cold winter day. you hum as you feel the water with your fingers. you get into the shower and begin washing your hair and body. once you get out of the shower you wrap a robe, that daphne had given you, around your body and wrapped your hair up in the towel. you open the bathroom door to see lou sitting on the bed. "gah!" you exclaim, frightened that someone was sitting on your bed. lou smirks at you as you desperately try and close your robe. she chuckles as she says, "sorry, didn't mean to scare ya." you manage to catch your breath from the scare. "it-it's alright," you say trying to calm your emotions. lou fiddles with the rings on her fingers. "i just wanted to see how you were doing. i know it's a little weird being around all these new people, so i just wanted to see how you were hanging," she says looking back into your eyes. her pale blue eyes glimmering in the sunlight. "i'm doing fine," you say. "honestly, anything is better than being back at home." lou nods, still maintaining the smirk on her face. she pops off the bed, taking a good look at you. "get dressed, ok?" you shift on the balls of your feet, slightly embarrassed. "why?" you ask. "cause i'm taking you out to dinner, i need to talk to you." 

a.n - i'm so sorry it took so long for me to post this! i had a really difficult time writing this chapter, just because it seemed so weird no matter how i wrote it. but now i think i've gotten it down. also, thank you so much for the recent support! we have over 1k reads! that's insane! thank you all so much. i hope you all are staying safe & healthy. much love <33  i promise to be better about uploading ;]

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