Two Thousand Miles from Me

7. Paris

Jase ran a hand through his hair in frustration as Tessa bumped past him in a huff for the tenth time that morning. He pulled his black fleece out of his bag, the weather would be colder up here. He thought of reminding Tessa of that fact, but wasn't sure if she would even respond to him or if she would just glare at him. They hadn't said more than two words that morning, Tessa was in obvious pain and probably embarrassed about last night, Jase just wanted to get away from her.

Pulling on the shirt, he wondered how a woman could be so confusing, and why the one he loved in particular never seemed to answer his questions directly. Why had she kissed him? Was she saying 'goodbye'? 'I'm sorry'? 'I miss you'? 'Good luck trying to figure this one out'? He smirked to himself, it had taken a lot of his anger and most of his will power to leave her alone. But based on the scowl that seemed tattooed on her face this morning, he'd made the wise decision.

She bumped into him again as she passed from the bathroom to her bag again. She'd kept in mind the weather of Maine this time of year and was wrapped in a thick scarf over a maroon sweater. How did someone with stitches over her eye, and a scowl on her face look so beautiful? He wondered as he watched her gather her last few things. Even her hair was done, she was wearing eye makeup and then he remembered— they were seeing her mom today. The more put together Tessa appeared, the fewer questions Muriel was going to ask.

They still hadn't spoken by the time they were in the car and pulling out of the hotel parking lot. Jase needed a stiff drink for the day ahead of him, the last few hours with Tessa, but he decided he would settle for some very black coffee instead.

Jase noticed Tessa rubbing at her ribs when she thought he wasn't looking as the stopped for coffee.

"You should take some pain medication," he suggested as they walked in to order their drinks.

"Yeah, you'd probably like that, wouldn't you?" she growled at him as she brushed through the door he held open for her. "I'm never touching those things again," she scowled darkly at him and Jase could smell danger. The two of them ordered quickly and then stood for a few minutes waiting for their drinks.

"You're in pain, you should take something for that," he kept at it anyway.

"The riding in the car isn't helping any of this," she said making a large circular motion over herself.

"You're the one who doesn't like to fly," he muttered back, done with her dark attitude for the day.

"You're the one who volunteered to take the trip, if you didn't want to be around me you shouldn't have offered," she snapped. Jase gritted his teeth and accepted their coffee silently, but couldn't hold his tongue as they walked out to the car.

"If I hadn't showed up in that Emergency Room, you'd probably be getting that engagement ring of yours fixed," he said it quietly, but he knew she'd heard him because her glare snapped towards him as they went to separate sides of the truck. Jase hesitated before opening his car door, this was going to be such a long drive.

"I would have left with or without you Jase Cooper— I could have left whenever I wanted to," she was almost yelling now as they pulled onto the interstate, and her face was turning red.

"No need to remind me, I know first hand of your ability to just pick up and leave when the mood strikes," he snapped back in an even tone, he kept his eyes on the road— ignoring how angry she was made her even irritated, or at least that used to work.

"What exactly is that supposed to mean?" she demanded, he might be trying to ignore her but he had her full attention. Jase was silent, but finally asked

"Why would you leave me and stay with Graham?" It seemed the hand of God himself suddenly shut Tessa's mouth. Her face turned another shade of red, she shifted away from Jase in her seat and stared straight out the window.

"That's where I'm really confused Tessa Craig, in fact I feel a little crazy sometimes. Maybe I just imagined that you and I were happy, or maybe I imagined that Graham was an aggressive misogynist who tried to beat you to death. Because they cannot both be true, it does not make sense."

"I did think we were happy," he continued to muse on without looking at her, without waiting for her to respond, "There was no warning, at least none that I can remember and I've gone over that week before you left at least a million times. Just trying to figure out what it is I did, or if something happened, if someone scared you off, or if there was something I could've noticed or said that would've kept you on the ranch."

"You should've told me you were unhappy, we could've moved, we could've sold the ranch or traveled to Paris like you wanted, or even had chocolate wedding cake. See— I don't know what it is that I did wrong, so I go over every little thing about our life there at the end, trying to understand what made you want to leave me." Still she didn't respond.

"Honestly, I think it must have been something earth shattering, the way you quit on yourself, left behind the horses, you can't compete without them, so I know you're not doing that. You left the shop, you don't have any kind of work besides being a punching bag in an evening dress," he paused, "Maybe I shouldn't feel so bad," he added, "You quit on yourself just as much as you quit on me."

"Tessa, you don't even talk to any of our friends anymore, did you think they were on my side? Most of them wanted to know what I had done that made you leave, and then you never answered their calls. Did you really mean to shut out everyone? I mean, before we get there I'd love to know just how long it's been since you talked to your mom?"

"This is none of your business," she finally responded in a low tone, without looking at him, "It was my choice." They sat in silence for ten minutes before Jase asked her point blank,

"Please tell me why you left," he looked towards her side of the car, reached out to touch her arm but she shrugged him off and kept her face towards the window.

"No."