My master, or My lover (bdsm)

I is for.....

After taking the home test Andrew wanted to be sure. So he set a date with a doctor friend. So here we are in a waiting room pull of prego or finding out like me. I, " if I am. I want a boy." Andrew chuckled, "why?" I, " just cause. " A nurse came out. Nurse, " Indira Enlow? " We got up and followed the nurse. He took my weight and height. I am 130 lbs and 5'3". We went into a room. I sat on the table and Andrew went to the chair. Minutes later a doctor and nurse came in. Doctor, "hello ms. Enlow and Andrew. So we're here to take the pregnancy test." The nurse came forward. She had the blood taking stuff. I gulped. Andrew grabbed my free hand. They stuck the needle in and took my blood. Doctor, "so this will take a a minute." The nurse left. Doctor, "so this is your fiancé wick?" Andrew, "yes nate. Indira this is my friend nate helmsman." Nate, "didn't I tell you to use protection idiot." He slapped Andrew on the side of his head. Andrew, "shut it nate." They bicker ed for a minute. Dr. Helmsman left to get the results. I, "He seems very blunt." Andrew, "he's different. " He came back. Dr. Helmsman, "well you two congrats. You're not pregnant. " Andrew, "thanks nate." He left and I got up. Andrew, "let's go eat." I followed him out. He looked disappointed. I, "did you um actually want a baby drew?" Andrew, "yeah. I just want to a father and I love you so much." I held his hand and squeezed it. I, "We can try?" Andrew, "really?" I nod. He pulled out the spot and headed to the exit. Suddenly nate was in front of the car. Andrew pressed on the brakes. Nate went to my side. Nate, "holy crap! I made a mistake. I grabbed the wrong file. But I got the right one see?!" It had my name on it. He opened it and looked over. Nate, "man. Congrats guys. You're pregnant. You might want to sue the company of those duds. You Indira need to come in and get an ultra sound." Andrew pulled into a new spot and we got out. Nate, "a little Andrew running around in 9 months. That's scary."

I held the picture. The baby was a tiny dot. We were at home. Andrew, "one month wow." I, "I have a baby in me." He kissed my forehead. The bell rang. Andrew got up and got it. I saw his parents come in. Lauren, "so what is so important you called me from my show?" They sat down. Andrew grabbed the picture. He gave it to her. She looked at it and was speechless. Carson, "what's going on Hon?" Lauren, "were going to be grandparents!!"Carson, "Indira is pregnant? " She nod. Carson, "let's leave the ladies to talk. We'll get dinner. Come on son." They left. Lauren, "are you okay?" I, "I just don't want to be like my mom."Lauren, "so it's true." I, "what?" Lauren, "what your mom did. Hurting her own child. She always wanted control. I'm so sorry Indira." I, "you knew?" Lauren, "not all of it but I saw somethings. Thanksgiving when you were 15 your mom wouldn't let you eat. Your bruised wrist and the small cuts. The blank look in your eyes. Disappearing for a whole summer. Coming back almost broken. I tried to get through her. Make her stop. You are suppose to be different. Every child is. Your two older sister's let her brake them. But you fought. You still fight against them. You saved Clarisse. Quinn never knew when enough was enough." It went quiet.

Andrew, "I think we should move. To a bigger place with 4 bedrooms." I, "4?" Andrew, "well yeah. For when we have more." More? Andrew, "can you imagine it now. 2 boys and a girl." I smiled at him but i knew i was scared. He continued on about the family he invented in his head. I never knew my best friend wanted a family so badly.

I got to work on time. I entered my room and went to my desk. I dropped my purse and kicked it under the desk. I sat down. I froze in shock. I saw my old journal. My hands were shaking. I grabbed it. How did this get here? I opened it and saw everything I ever wrote. I got to the last page. It was a poem.

I is for....

I is for Indira. A girl who is nothing
I is for insecure.
I is for imperfect.
I is for insane.
I is for immature.
I is for inferior.
I is for insignificant.
I is for invisible.
All this things Indira is.

A sob left my mouth. I read it over and over again. I knew who wrote this. Their handwriting was unique. I grabbed my phone. I dialed the number. They answered on the first ring. I, "you are a low inhumane person." She laughed, "why thank you daughter." I, "I wanted you to be there but screw you. You'll never ever meet your grandbaby." The phone went silent. Mother whimpered, "you're pregnant? By Andrew?" I, "yes and the baby will never know who his grandmother is. I'll never be like you. I hope your happy." I hung up. I cleaned my face and got everything ready.