pure heaven

chapter four

Chapter Four: Well This is Awkward

It's been a week sense the library incident. I've been avoiding him at all costs. I see him I turn the other way. In class I ignore him and book it out of class before he can say something.

It's not that I don't want to talk to him because I do... but no thank you. Nova always points him out anytime she see's him and every time I slam my hand over her mouth.

Right now I'm at my job at this book shop named "Lilly Jones Bookshop". Lilly was the original owner it's now her daughters. Ms. Jones is the sweetest old lady I've ever met.

Usually old people are cranky and mean but not Ms. Jones. She's basically like my mom. She's 85 proudly turning 86 this year.

I was in 3rd grade when I saw this shop. I immediately felt at home and at peace. Ms. Jones saw me and welcomed me with open arms. She of course called my mom and told her what happend.

My mom said that she trusted me and that she had to go.  I guess Ms. Jones felt bad for me because she told me I could come here any time I wanted to. Ever sense then I've been coming here almost everyday.

Once I was in highschool she offered me a job here. Of course I helped around the shop before but now I would get the money. I declined at first but would help her with the shop. She refused that idea.

One thing to know is that if your arguing with Ms. Jones your never going to win. So I accepted but I always let her know she doesn't have to pay me.

It's currently 7:30 pm and I'm putting away books when the front bell rang. I went to the front and saw him. The boy I've been avoiding for a week, the boy that makes me get butterflies at the very sight of him, the boy that makes my palms sweaty, the boy ok I think we get it.

Why now?

Why here?

He's never been here before so why is he here? I pray that Ms. Jones will pop out all the sudden like the witch she is but she told me long ago that's not how it works (nine year old me was very disappointed). She's already at home though she leaves at 6.

I hear the costumer service bell that's on the front desk if someone needs help go off. I think I'm about to shit my self. Ok you got this. No big deal. It's just another customer just go for it.

I come around from the book shelf and holy shit... How can someone look so good when wearing the most simple clothes He's wearing gray sweatpants and a dark blue nike sweatshirt. I think I'm about to pass out. Ok what do I say.

What do you mean what do you say you say?

Not you... go away.

No.

Yes I have to concentrate so go away.

I'm helping you though.

No your not so go away.

Fine but don't miss me when you fail bitch.

Rude. Anyway did I just have a conversation with my self. Yes. Did I also probably just look like a weirdo in front of him now and scare him away. Also yes.

"Are you ok?" He asks with his ridiculously hot voice.

"Oh um- Yeah sorry I- um... What can I help you with?" Real smooth Willow.

He chuckles under his breath. Is it hot in here? "You're good. I'm just looking for a book to give to my brother. It's his birthday soon and I wanted to get an idea of what I'm gonna get him. Any recommendations for a 8 year old boy?"

"Do you know what kind of books he reads?" I ask in a light voice. He scratches behind his neck awkwardly and shakes his head no. I can see her embarrassed and that's the last thing I want him to feel,

"Oh that's perfectly fine. What I do for my friend is take her somewhere and whatever they see I'll get it. It sounds ridiculous but actually really helps-" I stop myself realizing I started talking too much. I look up at him to see him staring at me with a small smile playing on his lips.

"Sorry" I saw with an awkward laugh "what I meant to say was just find a book that fits him." I say with a shy smile.

"No your perfectly fine. In all honesty I think I might just ask him. I don't know why I came here without a clue. I'm so sorry about disturbing you. Your probably busy. Again I'm so sorry." He says fast.

"No, no I wasn't busy at all actually haha." Now we are just staring at each other in awkward silence. He opens his mouth like he's going to say something but decides not to. Well this is awkward. He clears his throat,

"Well I should probably get home."

"Yeah have a good night." I say with a smile

"Thanks you too and I'll be back." He says with a smirk playing on his lips. Just before he opens the door he turns around and sends a wink and a dazzling smile towards me. "See you around." I just wave not trusting myself to speak.

I turn around and walk back to my book cart. I'm thinking one, what the hell just happened, two I need to learn how to not be so socially awkward, and three I'm very hungry.

Ok so I may have or may not have lied... it depends on how you look at it! I already bought my brother a gift but he does really like books. So when I saw her in that book store I knew I had to do something.

There's just something so alluring about her. I cant get her out of my head. I was ashamed when she asked what he liked to read. I wasn't really close with my brother.

He's 8 and I'm 17 turning 18. With football and homework I don't have a lot of time so spend with him. Of course we talk and I love him we just don't have a tight bond like other brothers might have. I do wish I could spend more time with him. He's truly and amazing kid.

I guess she could see how embarrassed I was, so she brushed it off like it was nothing and just smiled. She started to ramble and I think it might be my favorite thing now. It's so cute and when she blushed after she caught herself. For some odd reason I want to be the one to make her blush.

No you know what that's a promise. I'll be the one to make her blush... its only in the matter of time...