𝐃𝐞𝐚𝐫... 𝐲𝐨𝐮 [𝒁𝒊𝒈𝒈𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑵𝒊𝒄𝒌]

𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑻𝑯 𝑳𝑬𝑻𝑻𝑬𝑹

July 15, 1986

Dear Ziggy...

Today I finally realized something, something I may have tried to ignore for the last few years.

I am not the same boy you met that night.

My father told me that after sacrifices something changes inside you, it's part of the price, and I wanted to think that with me it wouldn't be the same, but it is.

I knew it from that day, yes, but I didn't want to admit it until now.

Eight years have passed and I've realized that I will always regret the hurt I caused, especially to you, who I know I will love for the rest of my life, but what's the point of continuing to mourn you? I will miss you forever, but I made the decision to give a name, I was young and too cowardly to stand up to my father, if I could change it I would, but I can't.

I have to learn to live with my decision.

I got tired, Ziggy, going out every day remembering what I did to be where I am is torture and I can't go on living like this.

You will always be the person I love the most, I will always miss you, but I will learn to live with the pain instead of continuing to drown in it.

I hope someday you will come to that conclusion too.

Love, Nick.