Handcuffed To My Bully | Larry Stylinson Fanfic ✔

Chapter 29

[Harry]

After dinner last night with everyone, Louis and I headed off to bed and got a pretty good sleep-well, as good as it could get. You see, I really wanted Louis to sleep with me, or atleast cuddle a little like before, but because we got un-handcuffed neither of us really knew what we could actually do.

I hoped that he would want to stay in bed with me,  but I just left the decision up to him since I wasn't sure if he actually wanted to stay ot not. He seemed hesitant at first but he left after a minute or two of thinking.

I'm not going to lie, seeing Louis walk out that door and into the guest room made me feel really sad. What does this mean for our relationship? Do we go back to hating eachother-the fighting, the bullying, the genuine hatred?

What does this all actually mean?

I don't know and I really want to talk to Louis about all this but I don't know how he'll react. He's gotten use to my childish side and everything, but it's not like we're in a romantic relationship or anything. It would be weird.

I get that we could act like a couple sometimes, but I guess it was a way that we both expressed our comfort around eachother. Like, there is no way Louis would actually like me. We hate eachother.

Well.

Personally, that hate has been feeling a bit differently lately.

I know that I don't actually hate him anymore, I'm not that much of an idiot. But, what I don't understand is what I feel for him.

I've never really liked anyone since I've  been taught to be with Olivia, so other girls never really intrested me. Louis on the other hand, he's the only person that's been able to make me feel happiness apart from Olivia and Ross. Sure my friends too, but that's more or less like an act, I guess. It's hard to explain.

That's another topic by itself.

Anyways, back to Louis.

I'm not sure how or when it happened, but Louis somehow made a break through with me and now I can't help but think that I've developed some sort of feelings for him.

At first I thought it was of a friendly love or bond, now I can't be sure. As far I know, your heart isn't supposed to drop nor skip beats around your friends. Pretty sure that's only caused by either a crush or some sort of heart problem.

I can be quite oblivious to my own feelings in general, sometimes not feeling certain emotions. That's why I've recently had a suspicion about my feelings for Louis.

I don't feel that way around any of my other friends, so I researched it and one of the responses was having a crush. I tried to deny it so much times, but I can't ignore it any longer.

I told myself I'd play it off until after the project, but now that the projects ending early I don't know what to think anymore.

Again, I'm not 100% if this really is a crush, but what I am 100% sure off is that I don't want to go back to Louis' and I's old ways. I've sadly grown attached to him and now he's taken over my entire head and heart (?)

I spent all night last night thinking about all this, and I'm honestly so lost. I wish someone could just tell me how I feel, why I'm feeling these things, and how to stop it! I hate all this so much.