saturday 25/9

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11 PM— måneskin's rented house

the music coming from the strong speakers is giving me a headache as i hold onto my small plastic cup filled with beer for dear life.
this is the second party i'm attending in a month and i am already starting to get tired of it.

i've danced so much my feet have gone numb and i have no idea where my friends are.

i stare blankly at the dancing figures all around me and i take a sip off of my drink.

“what are you doing here all alone?” my friend, damiano, appears out of the crowd.

“taking a break” i say and gesture at the red plastic cup in my right hand.

“i could really use one too” he says and i pass him my cup. he takes a sip off of it and sighs.

“for a rockstar you really do hate parties, huh?” i comment.

“it was thomas' idea” he whines “and besides, we hadn't thrown one in a while so i agreed”

“acceptable answer” i say and down the remains of my drink “have you seen vic? or ludovica?”

“i don't know about ludovica but last time i saw vic she was talking to some girl” he says and smiles awkwardly when he sees my shoulders sulk.

“you should really talk to her”

“i know but after all the shit we've been through i can't just fall back into it”

“but you two fucked literally a week ago” he says.

i play the events of that night in my head. how our bodies were tangled up with the sheets and how tired we both were afterwards as we slept in each other's arms, then wake up in the morning and act like nothing had happened.

“she left without a word as soon as she made sure that i woke up.” i remind him.

“i know” he says and looks into the crowd “but i can't make her apologise to you nor take sides. you're both my friends and you're both adults, so it's your job to solve this if you want to. i am here if you need a shoulder to cry on or if you need any advice, but that's all i can offer”

“thanks dami” i say and he pulls me into his arms, gently caressing my hair for a few seconds.

“but hey! this is a party, so let's have some fun while we can!” he looks at me and takes my hand, his eyes asking me to join him to the dancefloor.

i nod and he smiles widely and drags me into the sweaty crowd.

thomas appears next to me and passes me a cup.

“what is this?” i yell into his ear in order to be heard over the loud music.

“a total bomb” he yells back.

without a second thought, i down the entire cup as everyone is cheering for me.

~~~~

i stumble alone in a relatively more quiet hallway.
i am not blackout drunk yet but i am feeling pretty dizzy.

i managed to escape the loud party that is going down in the living room in an attempt to find my best friend, ludovica, who is supposed to be the one driving us both tonight and who i lost the moment we stepped inside the large house.

“where the fuck are you, ludo...” i mutter as i lean against the cold wall.

i slide down and sit on the floor for a couple of seconds, trying to remain in control of my own body.

“i need a bed” i announce to myself as i pull myself up and start going from door to door.

because of the loud music downstairs, it's hard to hear a thing so i just check to see if the doors are locked.

the first three rooms i check —thomas', ethan's and damiano's— are all locked from the inside, my last option being victoria's.

i stand in front of the closed door for a few seconds and then i try the handle.

it's unlocked!

the door swings open, but instead of an empty room, i am met with two very much naked bodies on the bed in front of me.

ma che cazzo, ludo!” i yell and instantly run away from the room, not bothering to turn around when the two girls call out my name.

i can feel my chest ache and my eyes burn as i push around the living room trying to locate a familiar face.

in the end i collapse on the large grey couch, completely ignoring the couple that is making out next to me as i try to clear my mind.

the image of my best friend and my ex naked haunts my thoughts as i can slowly feel hot tears stream down my cheeks.

“luna! there you are” a familiar voice says and pulls me into a drunken hug.

i do my best to hide my sobs, but i fail and damiano instantly notices it.

“why are you crying?” he looks concerned as he helps me up and takes me to a more quiet room.

i bawl my eyes out in damiano's chest as he is slowly sobering up.

“let's try this again” he says after i've stopped sobbing and he wipes the tears off of my cheeks “what happened?”

“i saw ludo and vic in bed together” i say and blow my nose in a paper towel damiano gave me a moment ago.

“what?”

“they were fucking, dami.” i start sobbing again as damiano's drunk brain tried to process what i just said.

cazzo, vic” he whispers and kisses the top of my head.

i keep crying in his arms, not wanting to talk about it any more as he draws shapes on my back to comfort me.

for the rest of the night i manage to avoid both ludovica and victoria and ethan, being the only sober friend of mine, drove me home.

.

.

.
ah the drama

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