Dissolving

Chapter 38 - Liars

The phone buzzes again. I turn it the right side up to check its screen, hoping that it is Will, with news form the East Coast. But most likely it will be something pointless on the family chat. Because nothing meaningful or eye-opening is ever shared on there.

My heart stops a beat when my eyes narrow in on the sender's name above the message on the lock screen.

Finn?

I quickly shove the phone back underneath my thigh and pretend as if nothing has happened while I try to get my heartbeat under control. My heart is now trying to jump right out of my chest, after it almost stopped when I saw his name.

Glancing left and right, I check to see if anybody is looking at me. I find Noah staring out of the window, appearing to be half asleep, while Jack is busy with his own phone. The two boys in the front are, once again, squabbling over what music to listen to. A grin tugs at my lips. Sam must have the patience of a saint that he hasn't thrown Aidan out of the car yet.

Normally, listening to their bickering is pretty annoying, but now I am glad that they seem to be preoccupied enough to not pay any attention to me. Just what I need. Because I don't want eyes on me if I decide to reply to Finn.

It's not that I don't want to chat to him. We haven't spoken since that time when Gracie called him from her phone, after my failed attempt at getting money from Kolinsky. We only exchanged a few irregular chat messages in the weeks after, but nothing more than a few random hi's and how are you's. Also, I still don't feel comfortable calling him from my own phone rather than the burner phone, even if Alex assured me that he is the only person who monitors what I am doing with my phone.

He claims that he will only check for details if he has reasons to believe that I am not sticking to the rules or that I am not safe using the internet. I guess I have to trust him that he respects my privacy. But I know that he can see my call history and, although he told me that he is fine about me being friends with Finn, I am still hesitant to let him know when and how often we are in contact.

Alex may have forgiven Finn for being my accomplice when I ran away last year, but if he knew that he also played a vital role in me meeting up with a drug dealer, he'd probably not be very impressed. Luckily, he doesn't know anything about that meeting. He still thinks that we just disappeared in the mall without telling Jack. I will do whatever I can to keep it that way.

The phone vibrates a third time.

After another quick glance left and right, which confirms that all of my brothers are still plenty occupied with themselves, I pull it back out to read the messages. They are all from Finn and – not so surprisingly – none from Will.

F.H. – Hello, Tiny!

F.H. – How's the desert? No heat stroke yet?

One of our brief exchanges was right before the start of the summer vacations and I told him about our travel plans. He found it hilarious and teased me relentlessly for being a drama queen after I claimed that I might not survive this.

F.H – Hellooooo???? Do I have 2 send Lawrence of Arabia out there 2 save u?

While I am staring at the screen, wondering who on earth that Lawrence guy would be, another message comes in.

F.H. – If I dont hear from u in the next 20mins I'll do just that.

I roll my eyes at his being so persistent and impatient. First, he doesn't get in contact for months after leaving out of the blue, then we start to casually chat every once in a while, and now he's suddenly acting like it is the end of the world if I don't immediately reply?