Antagonist: Dependent

CHAPTER 4

                                  A waiting game

It's been about 2 months or so since I came back home.I totally forgot about family or friends . I didn't care if anyone's alive . The telephone is not working nor is the television. I miss my kdramas and anime. Sometimes I wonder if my idols are even alive. Death has been on my mind for a long time. I had already come to terms and accepted that my mother is no longer here with me.

I didn't really venture out of Bukit Panjang too much. I was too scared. I still don't know how to operate the SAR-21 rifle. I couldn't really hunt either. I ate the beast I killed that day. I could not refrigerate it so I cured it using leftover salt I found and dried them. They lasted for 3 weeks as the beast was really big and fleshy, but it tasted horrible and bitter. The house was practically empty and there was no more food left.

I would go up to the water tank on the roof level and dispense the water from there.I wouldn't really filter nor boil my water as I keep failing to light a fire despite multiple tries and I don't have a kettle or water filter.I would bathe in the rain and wash my clothes with just water.I could not think of a better alternative . I thought of going to the community garden nearby but I am worried the vegetables could be contaminated too. I have practically looted every convenience store in the vicinity but most were already empty.

I looted a few glock-17's and bullets, body armour like knee protectors and visors, frag grenades and riot shields. They were pretty gruesome to loot from as I had to remove the blood and the occasional body fluids. But I had no use for them yet . I don't plan on exploring far nor have I encountered any trouble. I just collected these stuff for fun so I could build my little armoury in case I needed it .

I have never encountered any signs or human life in my 2 months of wandering and exploring post apocalyptic Bukit Panjang.Maybe the more frequent larger than usual bird or rat and the occasional beast i fought that day but I would avoid it at all cost as I got lucky that day and there's no way i'm pushing my luck again.

The wind howled outside the broken window, the curtain flapping in the cold wind blowing in. I huddled against the corner of my bedroom, wrapping myself in my blanket. It was considerably cold that night, something that was rare in hot and humid Singapore.

" I could really go for a hot cup of milo right now"
Had this been before the outbreak, I would be going out the door for something warm to eat. I got up and reached into the dresser for a matchstick to light the candle. I needed something warm amid this freezing night. My swaying gaze chanced upon a piece of paper on the table. The table I left the note from my mother on 2 months ago. Memories of that day when I found that letter came flooding back. It was only 2 months ago but it felt like years ago. I must have gotten used to the new way of life. I was a person who was easily fazed but able to adapt really quickly.

I missed my mother , my friends and the bustling atmosphere of the city. I needed that again. I may not be able to find the latter, but I know I can find my family. At least I would have a chance at that.I imagined how my mother would feel knowing that I was alive and I was too timid to go find her. She didn't bring me up this way. Even if it were under this same circumstance, it all applied. Well that's even if she was alive.

I know what I have to do the next morning.

I wasn't sure if it was merely the cold and comfy environment that made me lean towards the nostalgic side of me , but I felt that side. In the past 2 months, I was so busy trying to survive that I had no time to think of the past or recollect about my life before. How my world changed and how I am living in a world ,a world reimagined.