The Aberrations of S.I.D.E.

No. 34: Not Anymore

Aaaaaaaaaaaah shit.

Janus gasped and clapped his hands over his mouth. "Oh. My. Fucking. Gods."

"Guys---" Virgil sighed.

"YOU TWO HAD SEX!" Janus and Remus screeched. Virgil buried his head in his hands.

"Not officially?" Roman said, scratching the back of his neck. "I mean, the circumstances weren't ideal, so we decided to just call it a trial run---"

"Hey, I don't care what you call it," Remus interrupted. "I just gotta know one thing."

"Which is?"

Remus grinned. "Who was on top?"

Roman turned bright red. "Well, I mean, it doesn't really matter---"

"Me," Virgil announced, raising his hand.

Remus nodded. "Yep, checks out."

"Oooooh, lucky boy," Janus said, shoving Virgil slightly. "Didn't know you had it in you."

Virgil smirked. "How do you know I was lucky?"

"HEY!" Roman said indignantly.

"Relax, I was just teasing. You're good."

"Well, to answer your very interesting question, Mr. Hayashi, I'd like to remind you that your boyfriend is my boyfriend's identical twin," Janus said casually, looking at his gloved fingernails. "And if their body types are exactly alike, well..." He smirked. "All I can say is congratulations."

"Okay, shut up," Roman cut in. "That's really none of your business---"

"Roman, you are my future brother-in-law and the boyfriend of one of my best friends!" Janus exclaimed. "I have full right to tease you about this!"

"Guess we have more in common than we thought, huh?" Remus said, ruffling Roman's hair.

"Both of you, shut up!" Roman snapped, batting Remus's hand away. "We both agreed that it didn't count, because between what happened last night and what we have to do now, it shouldn't be a night to remember for anything but the wrong reasons! So drop it, okay?"

Janus and Remus both fell silent, looking a little bit guilty.

"Good." Roman exhaled. "I'm glad we got that out of the way. Now, if you'll excuse us, Janus, me and my brother need to have a little chat with our sperm donor."

Remus cringed. "Oh. Yeah. I was... I was kinda hoping not to think about---"

"Well, we have to think about it now, so come on." Roman started off down the hall, dragging Remus along with him.

Virgil looked over at Janus. "So, you wanna eavesdrop, or...?"

"I think it's better that this conversation stays private," Janus answered. "I mean, we should absolutely be on standby in case things get out of hand, but let's leave them alone for the most part."

"Cool." Virgil awkwardly scuffed his foot on the floor. "So, what are we gonna---"

"How'd Nox take it?"

Virgil blinked. "Uh, what?"

"Your shadow, Virgil," Janus reminded him with a small smirk. "Don't tell me you've forgotten he exists. How'd he take you and Roman..." He waved his hand around. "You know?"

"I, uh, actually don't know." Virgil looked down at the form of Nox on the floor---even though it was midwinter, the lights inside were bright, so he was pretty visible. "What did---"