So." James said on Sunday evening, "How are we going to get them back?"
"Get who back?" Peter asked without looking up, searching through his notes for something.
They were in the Gryffindor common room, trying to do their homework for McGonagall. Fourteen inches on the basic laws of transfiguration. Sirius and James had finished theirs, Peter was at least six inches in, and Remus hadn't started.
"The Slytherins." James hissed, "Keep up, Pete."
"Not all of the Slytherins," Peter asked, sounding worried, "Only Snape and Mulciber, right?"
"All of them." Sirius confirmed. He had just appeared from under the desk they were sharing, and presented a piece of parchment, "This what you were looking for?"
"Thanks!" Peter grabbed it, relieved, "I've nearly finished..."
"Have you done it, Lupin?" Sirius looked over. Remus had opened his book, but hadn't so much as looked at it. He'd considered cloistering himself away in the library one evening and trying to read it properly – he could read if he really, really focussed. But the opportunity hadn't presented, and if he was honest; he just didn't want to. Ever since the Potions lesson the four of them had become real friends, and Remus didn't want to miss out.
"Nah," He shrugged in response to Sirius. "Can't be bothered." "Let us know if you need help."
"You can copy mine if you want." James pushed his across the desk. Remus pushed it back, gritting his teeth.
"I'm fine. I'm not stupid."
"No one said you were." James replied, casually. Sirius was looking at him, though. Remus wanted to hit him, but he was trying not to lash out so much – James and Sirius sometimes play wrestled, but they never actually tried to hurt each other, like he had with Snape. Forcing himself to swallow his temper, Remus opted instead to change the subject.
"We could put itching powder in their beds." He offered. Someone had done that to him once. He had a rash for a full week, and on the night of the full moon had torn at his skin more than usual. "Or on their clothes... if we could figure out who does the laundry, anyway."
This had been a matter of great concern to Remus – their dirty laundry appeared to just vanish and then resurface, cleaned and folded in their trunks. He'd never caught anyone else in their room, and couldn't understand it at all.
"I like it." James replied, chewing his quill, "Anyone got any itching powder, though?" The three boys shook their heads.
"Could order some from Zonko's." Sirius put in. "If you let me borrow your owl, James, Mum confiscated mine after the sorting."
"I s'pose," James replied. "Wish we could do it sooner, though. You know, strike while the iron is hot."
"Don't need to buy itching powder," Remus said, suddenly, having a brainwave, "Do you reckon they have rose hips in the greenhouse?"
"Yep," Peter spoke, head still bowed over his homework, "For healing potions – arthritis, I think."
"The hairs inside make you itch, really badly." Remus explained, excited, "Matron – the woman who runs the children's home – she grows them, and if you get in trouble she makes you seed them without gloves on." His fingertips itched just thinking about it.
"That's awful." James said.
"Good idea, though!" Sirius grinned. "Next break, we'll go and get a load of them. Then we can seed them – with gloves on – and put them in the Slytherin's bedsheets. Excellent!"
"How are we going to get into the Slytherin dorms?" Peter asked, finally finishing his work. "Leave that to me," James smirked, mercurially.
***
Getting the rose hips was easy. They sent Peter, who was the only one of them who hadn't been given a detention yet, and was therefore under the least observation. Peter was small and good at going unseen; he crept into the green house unnoticed during morning break and returned red faced and gleeful, with a jar full of rose hips under his cloak.
Then they'd all locked themselves away in their shared bathroom to seed all of the buds. Under Remus' close instruction, they all wore their heavy dragon hide gloves to do this, taking extra care not to touch the seeds or fine little hairs.
"I can't wait to see the looks on their faces." Sirius was grinning, sitting cross legged on the floor next to James.
Remus watched, sitting on the edge of the bath tub, James and Sirius' two dark heads bowed over the work. He was a little bit jealous of their friendship. They had so much in common – being raised into magic, both growing up wealthy, both completely mad about quidditch. In addition, it was clear that after only three weeks James and Sirius had managed to secure a reputation as joint kings of the first years. Everyone listened to them when they spoke. Everyone laughed when they were funny. No one even got annoyed if they lost house points.
"I still don't know how we're going to get into the Slytherin dorms – even Peter isn't that sneaky." Sirius glanced at James. He'd been trying to get him to reveal his plan ever since the bespectacled boy had mentioned it.
"Let me worry about that," was all James said.
The seeds and hairs were then decanted into another jar, while the boys ended up eating the leftover rosehips over the course of the week.
It was Tuesday evening when they finally had their chance. James decided that they would have to do it before everyone went to bed. He also decided that they ought to go to the Slytherin dorms separately, to avoid being seen together and discovered. Remus personally thought this was overkill, but went along with it, not wanting to ruin the other boy's fun.
