Darling deception- a criminal minds fanfic

Rules six, nine and ten

"That doesn't sound like 'I love you.'"

"Because I don't" Morgan teased over his shoulder as she burst into fake shocked laughter.

"Ouch, you're going to regret that when you get kidnapped on the job and I'm the only one left to pay your ransom- maybe I'll put my phone on silent just to let you squirm with your captor!"

"Now that I find hard to believe with how much time you spend on your phone."

"Just because I'm not old like you and actually use my phone more than once a day" she teased, shooing him off with a friendly middle finger as he got into the back passenger seat of the SUV where two of his agents on the team he was on in the BAU were waiting for him.

"And who was that lady friend of yours Derek?" The older agent, David Rossi, asked with a small teasing eyebrow raise at Morgan who shook his head with a chuckle.

"Not who you're thinking it was; I was just catching up with an old friend."

"Friend? Is that what you call your new weekly women now?" Emily Prentiss, another agent at the behavioural analyst unit in the FBI, teased.

"Does this 'special friend' need a ride home?" Rossi offered, spotting the young woman with 70's styled long blonde hair and blown out bangs walk over to the other side of the road near the highway, holding out her thumb with a cocking of her hip.

"What is she doing?" Emily asked, Morgan looking over out of the car window and shaking his head at the ridiculous scene.

"Darling- what on earth are you doing?"

"Jesus Christ on a cracker Derek, you can't scare a girl like that" she turned from the road as another car passed her, the driver eyeing her up and down but choosing to carry on driving given the SUV full of agents the other side of the road talking to her.

"Are you really going to try to hitch hike home right now?" Morgan called out again, Rossi and Emily exchanging glances, "Darling, you can't do that!"

"How'd you think I got here today? It's better for the environment than the bus" she smiled and turned back to the road, holding out her manicured thumb with a floral green pattern painted on it, "now shoo, you're cockblocking from getting a ride home."

"Oh so you're suddenly an environmentalist now, huh? Tell that to all the hairspray you used in high school" Morgan mocked before he got out of the car and held open the back door of the SUV open, waving her over, "come on- we'll drop you home before our case, my boss will somewhat understand if we're late to stop you getting kidnapped."

A large pickup truck pulled up next to Darling, shooting a smile back at Morgan before hopping into the truck, "I ain't got time to go the safe way home- my 'duty' calls too."

"Darling-" Morgan started to cross the road with a stern tone watching her already chat with the trucker who was far too keen for his liking.

"So what bring's a pretty little lady like you to the side of this dirty ol-"

"Darling, out of the truck now- come on, stop playing around before you end up in one of my case files" Morgan interrupted, now next to the passenger side door where Darling stuck out her head with a frown.

"Stop being a sour puss, you of all people should know I can more than handle myself."

"It's not being a 'sour puss' to not want you getting in a random car with a strange man on the side of the road, do you know how many of my unit's cases start that way?" Morgan went to open the door but the driver locked it, glaring at him with offence.

"Is this your boyfriend, or just a simple guard dog?" He grumbled at Darling who burst out laughing at both options.

"My boyfriend? Why you've got to be crazier than a barrel of shrimp waiting to roll into the ocean to think that he's my-"