SPOILER ALERT
Just watching movies and tv shows and then ranting about it. Give me sth you want me to talk about and I will try. Also ngl, this is more of character reviews rather than the overall film.
Disclaimer: SPOILER ALERT. ME BEING ENRAGED. If you don't care, read on.
Plot
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This movie broke me. There’s no structure. Like this review. Actually, this review might be structured better than the movie.
I’m not gonna hold back. I’m just gonna fucking rant about this shit. The whole movie was so fucking long. I kid you not, before we hit like halfway through the movie, I had to stand up and take a walk. Nothing happens in this goddamn movie, there’s no actual plot, and instead there are all these random fucking conflicts that just got thrown in for the sake of “oh, we gotta bring everyone back for the last one.” Like bitch, I don’t give a shit about Marco. Or deciding between Berkeley or Harvard. Or Chloe’s parents getting a divorce. Or Lee having a new friend. Or Lee’s girlfriend breaking up with him. (I don’t blame you Rachel, just leave this man-child.) Or Chloe visiting the Beach House. Oh no, there’s another fucking summer list. Just give the fucking list up. This movie enrages me. And that goddamn cursed fucking dance machine. Just leave that fucking shit alone. This movie makes me wanna punch something.
Oh my god, and when the mom was like I’m not selling the beach house. Like can you even do that? If the whole block or whatever is being demolished, isn’t there some kind of thing where you’re gonna be compensated, but you gotta move out? I don’t know real estate stuff, but apparently, she works in real estate, and she pulls this shit. You know what, I get why Lee is the way he is. His mom is the same. Actually, if they are gonna demolish something, I want it to be that gazebo thing that Elle and Noah kept meeting up in. Cuz that actually means something to the audience. That gazebo holds memories that the audience would resonate with more, not a dumb beach house we’ve never seen and don’t give a shit about.
And that ending: six years later. Why is Rachel back with Lee? It would be so much fucking better if Lee mentioned something like they didn’t work out. They’re not even the initial couple in the movie. And why is Noah in a suit? And they just had to throw that kissing booth in there.
Characters
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