Falling For Her (Tom Hiddleston Fanfiction)

Time Stamp

I grinned. "I like the way you think Miss Reynolds."

She smiled. "And we can move little things in tomorrow." She added.

"Perfect." I said.

Her smile fell a little bit as she thought. "Wait, what's tomorrow?" She asked.

"Monday" I answered. "Why?"

She sighed. Pressing her face into the pillow.

"What's the matter?" I asked.

She lifted her head. "I can't do anything tomorrow. I have a doctors appointment. I forgot about it. I'm meeting with my new doctor. And, checking up."

I bit the inner part of my cheek. Coming back to reality. The harsh reality that is Lilly's leukemia. For a few moments I forgot it even existed. Damn, I wish it didn't exist.

I studied her face intently. "You scared?"

She shrugged off any look of fear she had left on her face. "I don't know. I know its not going to be good news I'm getting. I know I should prepare for the worst. I don't really know what I feel about it."

"Want some company?" I asked. "It must suck going to those meetings alone."

She shook her head. "I don't think that'd be a good idea. The doctors probably going to tell me how long."

"And why is that not good for me to know?" I asked. "Lil, I'm gonna need to know one way or another. And you're gonna need a hand to hold when you find out. Why not kill two birds with one stone? Take me with you."

She contemplated. And finally sighed. "Okay. You can come."
-
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I had been in the waiting room for quite some time. As the doctor performed tests on Lilly.

Being away from her, was a little scary. I didn't know how I got to to be so protective of Lilly. I guess it was ever since she told me about her sickness. And how everyone let go of her.

I was the only one left for her.
Maybe it was that fact.

But eventually Lilly came out in one piece. And she signaled me to follow her. We were lead into an office by a nurse.
I was assuming it was her doctors office. And telling by the degrees hung up of the wall. He was a gifted man.

I had a glimmer of hope that maybe he was gifted enough to save her. I knew that wasn't really possible. But miracles happen.

Lilly and I sat down in from of his desk. Both of us quiet. She was quite jittery. I reached my hand over to hers. "Hey, you okay?" I asked, worried.

She looked at me. "I have a bad feeling is all. During the tests, I had a bad, bad feeling."

I gripped her hand, rubbing my thumb over it. "Hey. Whatever happens, whatever he says, we'll get through it. We have to. We will." I assured her to the best of my abilities. While trying to assure myself as well.

She nodded. Just as the was a slight knock on the door. The doctor walked in. His voice seemed so loud over ours.

"Miss Reynolds. How are we doing today?" Lilly and I stood up to greet him. She shook his hand. "I've been better. But, I can't complain." She answered him.

He smiled at her. Then turned his attention to me. "And this is?"

Before Lilly could introduce us. I interrupted. "I'm Tom. I'm Lilly's boyfriend. And her personal encouragement for today." I smiled. Giving him a firm handshake.

"Well, you can never have enough encouragment. Nice to meet the two of you. Sit, please." He pointed to the chairs we were in before. And we sat.

"Okay Lilly. We just ran those tests to see where you are right now, stage wise. And um, results are back." He seemed to talk slower and slower. Like his words were in a jumble. I knew that couldn't be good. I mean, he's a doctor.

Lilly sat up in her chair, trying her best not to figet. Although she didn't succeed too well. "Okay. Tell me. And please. Tell me straight. No need to go easy on me." She finished.

He sighed. "Your body isn't responding well to no treatment. And the cancer has spread. Very quickly, I must add." He looked down for a second at her folder. Then back up, staring straight into her eyes. Like a laser. "There is no chance of survival." He said bluntly. "I am so sorry Lilly."

Lilly's shoulders fell. But she didn't cry. She didn't really react. "Okay. I figured." She nodded. Her expression stern. "How long do I have?"

He closed her folder. "Oh, I'm afraid that's hard to calculate.." He began.

But Lilly and I both knew he was just avoiding conversation of it.

Lilly sighed. "Please. Don't bullshit me." She started. "Off the record, from your experience with cases like this, how long do you think I have."

The doctors jaw clenched. "A couple months. At most, 8 to 9 weeks." He explained. "The cancer will continue to spread to vital parts of the body. Like wildfire. And you'll eventually be bedridden. My rough estimate until that happens is about 4 weeks. And 8 weeks to live."

I was surprised of how bluntly he said it. But that's what she wanted. She want him to tell her straight. He did.

And when he said it. My my heart felt like it was ripped out, and thrown against the wall. Against all of his degrees.

I looked over to Lilly. She swallowed. "Okay. Well, thank you for telling me." She commented. In a hushed tone. She looked over to me for a half of a second.

Squeezing my hand before letting it go. "If you'll excuse me. I need to use the ladies room. Thank you again." She said. And left the room.

I stood up. Just as her doctor did. I didn't really know what to say.

I knew I had to be strong for her. But that was so hard. Because I couldn't even be strong for myself.

"She can't do chemo? She can't start chemo now?" I asked.

"Chemo wouldn't be effective. This late into her disease." He answered, disappointed.

"Is there anything you could do?" I asked, desperately.

"I'm sorry. If I could take back time. I would." He concluded.

Me too. If it were possible to go back in time. To when she found out. I would. Even if it meant the risk of not knowing her.

I guess the degrees on his wall weren't enough. He wasn't gifted enough to save her. No one was. She was too far gone.

"Okay. We'll thank you." I said. Shaking his hand and leaving. I walked toward the bathroom as Lilly walked out. Meeting me In the empty hallway.

"You alright?" I asked quietly. Although knowing the answer. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying. And her smile was non existent.

"No." She said. "I just found out that my life has a timestamp. And its hitting me like a ticking time bomb. I don't think I'll ever be okay with that." She sighed. Looking into my eyes. Pleadingly. "Why is it that lately, almost every time we talk, its always sad?"

I couldn't disagree with her. I felt the same way. But I snaked my arms around her anyways. "Then let's not talk." I said. And I hugged her tight.

She hugged me back. She hugged me for dear life.

Sorry for my grammar spelling mistakes! But here's the next chapter! (: