LOVE GOES. l.hs

02

ever since my love has gone away,
every single thing has turned to gray,
still I don't wanna say goodbye

'cause I could still feel you
you took my heart with you
and I can't love without you,
all I need is your love

➳

heeseung p.o.v

one month earlier.

"and that's it! good job everyone!" our manager clapped his hands and I immediately plopped down onto the floor leaning on the mirror. I grabbed my phone and opened my messages, finding my way to your contact.

I sighed, seeing the message above my keyboard.

"this account has been deleted."

nonetheless, I started typing.

heeseungbae is typing...

I'm sorry. I really am. but I hope that you're proud of where I got. I will never forget you, y/n. even if we couldn't meet in person, I could feel every word you send to me through the screen. truthfully, I miss you. I keep on thinking about you - how much I would've hurt you, how much I made you go through - it's making me hurt too. but I want you to know that I've been suffering these past months too, knowing that I'm just leaving you behind. but I had to. I needed to.

even if it took me some time to type everything out, I slowly backspaced everything and started typing something else.

heeseungbae is typing...

and maybe there's something I want to tell you. it made me really rethink my decision on debuting. I..I have feelings for you. it made it harder for me to let go. and it's foolish, I know. I'm an idiot for not telling you earlier. when I had the time. but it would just make things worse for us. I'm sorry.

and I erased it all again.

you wouldn't receive it anyways.

"heeseung." I turned my phone off and I looked up at our manager with a smile. "hyung, what is it?"

"you know you're risking your career for that girl, right?"

I gulped. I looked away at the floor for a second before nodding. "I very much do."

"well, if she was able to delete her account and move on, then maybe you should too-

"I can't just move on like that." I raised my voice at him but looked down in embarrassment afterwards. "I'm sorry."

I sighed deeply, feeling his hand pat my shoulder. "I'm just saying this because I want you to focus on your job as an idol. you were able to get this far and I'm sure you can push it a little farther too."

he said before walking away, walking out of the room. I looked down at my legs and shut my eyes, stopping my tears from falling.

I was able to get this far.

but why can't I just let it go and live my life?