Cheat [MxM] (Carter Brothers Book 1)

Chapter 22

However, I couldn't laugh, not anymore, not with my phone in my lap, line dead after Ezra cut the call. He finally called me back and the rush of utter relief I'd felt almost swept me off my feet. All the stress and the concern and the exhaustion of carrying around that fake, delighted mask of happiness, came crashing down around me and before I knew what was happening, one whisper of his name had me bursting into a flood of tears. I wasn't just crying, I was ugly, 'somebody call a fucking ambulance' sobbing. I couldn't stop it. 

I had so many questions that got caught in my throat as I choked, sat on my bed with no sleep after finishing work. How are you? What took you so long to call? What's happening? Where is Ollie, is he okay too? Do you need me? Anything? But before I could pull myself together long enough to speak, Ezra had beaten me to it. 

"I'm sorry Jae. So sorry. We shouldn't be together anymore. You're better off without me." 

I was still in shock. He was sorry? For what? Not answering the phone? For making me cry? I didn't want his fucking apology, I wanted him to talk to me! He can't just give me silence for two excruciating weeks and then decide that we can't be together anymore! That wasn't fair, he couldn't do that to me! Whatever was going on, we'd figure it out, we had to. I was way too invested in this relationship and he and Ollie were too valuable to loose, not now, not like this, not ever. I wasn't better off without him, he had no fucking right to decide that on my behalf! 

My blood began to boil and I shook my head, blinking rapidly to force a fresh tsunami of tears right back where they came from. I brought up Ezra's number and dialled his phone. No answer. I called again and again and again, my desperate fingers fumbling, the ringing line droning on in my ear like the soundtrack from a horror movie. 

I thought back to past me. The Jae who would sit on his couch like an entitled prick, shoving popcorn in his mouth while watching bad reality television. 'He dumped you babes, let it go, don't be desperate and cling after a rejection. You're better than that, it's not worth it. Pftt. That could never be me.' 

And yet here I was in that same pitiful position, unashamedly grovelling as I desperately called Ezra back, praying he'd at least have the decency to pick up the phone and explain himself. It wasn't over, I refused. God damn it, answer your phone! 

'The person you're trying to reach is unavailable. Please leave a message after the tone. Beep.' 

I slammed the phone down against my pillow, balling my fists as panic and shock turned to outrage. He won't answer the phone? Fine. I'll go knock on his bloody front door, he'll have no choice but to let me in or I'd climb through one of his windows. I would too - had plenty of practise during my teen years scaling windows of both my parent's house and my friends' houses. Part of me thought that would be going too far, but then again, I was well past the point of caring. 

I got up and frantically dressed, pulling back on my black work shirt from last night, not even caring about the slight scent of sweat that clung to it. I pulled on a pair of worn jeans after picking them up off the floor and rushed out of my room and down the hall for my shoes. I I yanked them on, shoved my keys in my pocket and reached for the door handle, ready to yank it open and go on a rampage. Then I paused, as though someone had chucked a bucket of ice cold water over my head and shocked me right back into reality. 

I didn't know where the fuck Ezra lived. 

Whelp, if that wasn't a sign from the devil, I didn't know what was. I let go of the door handle with a delirious giggle, backing away from it. I kicked off my shoes and trudged all the way back into the bedroom. I was still laughing like a druggie as I crawled into bed and pulled my blankets over my head, clothes still on. I needed to go to sleep before I had a mental health crisis in my home, alone. Everything else could wait and I'd wake up, happy with all my problems solved. Like magic. Yeah... that sounded nice. I was out like a light.