𝐌𝐢 𝐀𝐦𝐨𝐫 || 𝖳𝖾𝖼𝗁𝗇𝗈

꧁~It Was a Cold Night~(LXVII)꧂

c.67

(TW: Hallucinations, One Mention of Sexual Assault)

Words. Words couldn't begin to express what I meant, what I thought.

"Why would that be?"

I froze, caught off guard by the sudden voice.

"Dear child, answer me."

"Go away," I sighed, "I don't feel like talking, especially not with you."

The steps grew louder from behind me, but I remained sitting on the windowsill, looking through the glass.

"You say words can't even begin to express the truth of your thoughts, why?"

Gritting my teeth, I refused to engage in conversation.

"Dear child, either you talk or you don't, but I still get my answers."

It's voice burned into my head, echoes in an empty room.

"We'll come back to your conflict with words in a bit, but I'd like to understand more of this blonde-headed boy."

There was no stopping myself from looking over my shoulder with rapid reaction. Nothing stood behind me, but I knew better than to let my eyes linger, so I turned back around.

In an act of weakness, I asked, "Tyler?"

"Oh, is that his name, the name of the boy that's been on your mind for the last many hours?"

With prior hesitation and caution fading, I nodded with obedient response.

"It's your fault he's in trouble, isn't it?" the presence questioned with subtlety.

"N-no, he has anger issues, he just lost control of himself, but it wasn't m-my fault-"

"You're not responsible for sitting in silence as he was getting yelled at?"

My body trembled as the scene came back into my mind, "he... he was w-wrong in his actions."

"So it's fine by you if he gets suspended or even expelled?" it kept going, "even when he's supposed to be a friend, when friends deserve second chances?"

I brought a hand close to my chest, attempting to calm down.

"You sat in silence when he was being questioned by the principal, you could have shown that you were forgiving, but you cowered."

That was true, I had wanted to tell him that I forgave him, but I did nothing. In the end, it would be my fault if he faced punishment that could have negative consequences to him in the future.

"N—no more... please," tears rolled down my cheeks, "just g..go away!"

"Can you really not handle the truth of your mistakes?"

Dropping my head in agony, I vigorously wiped the droplets away as heavy cries filled the once quiet room.

I begged the presence to leave, but it only began to yell "it's your fault" over, and over again.